Guy's blog about life with pets in northern mich. for Saturday, April 14, 2007

I repudiate this blog. Don Imus and I were trying a "most outrageous, offensive. blog writing" contest, and I won. When I left for the bathroom, he posted it in my site, out of spite. That guy doesn't have to be so insensitive to the feelings of others and I'm going to have to rethink our friendship. Guy Newly discovered, chiseled in stone, quote: ”I don’t care what your dad told you Jesus, that whole ‘immaculate conception ‘ thing was a scam. Everybody knows that your mom is a slut! And Joe’s... Sign in to see full entry.

Here is part 2 of the story about a very tense day at work. Scroll down to the blog below this one, to read them in the right order. David, Thursday, when that woman was flopping around like a fish on hot sand, I wrote that I really hoped that she didn’t stop breathing. Since my boss would see it, I didn’t say that if she did stop, she would probably be as dead as Saddam and his headless half brother. At the council we got instructions on giving CPR and a refresher class each year. What the... Sign in to see full entry.

Last month, Corrine, a meal delivery recipient, nearly died while I was there. She was shaking so badly, she nearly couldn’t sit in her recliner without flopping out on the floor. She was terrified and I was hoping she didn’t stop breathing. She couldn’t talk except to say, N,N,N,N,N,N, for no and Y,Y,Y,Y,Y for yes. She did manage to let me know not to leave her alone. Of course I had no intention of leaving but she was terrified I would. I got her her meds and she took the important one but... Sign in to see full entry.

A man entered a bar early one day, threw several bills on the bar and asked the bartender to pour him six shots of tequila. The bartender set six shot glasses up on the bar, poured the drinks and lined them up in front of the customer. Without another word, the fellow began tossing them back. Curious, the barman said to the customer, “I don’t mean to bother you, but I’ve seen people order six shots before and then work their way down the line. Each time it was because that day was extra special... Sign in to see full entry.