Saturday, January 10, 2026
What do you call a detective that accidentally solves the case? Sheer Luck Holmes. What is it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials. What should you do if you’re cold? Stand in the corner, it’s 90 degrees. What does a clock do when it’s hungry? It goes back for seconds. Why did... Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, January 9, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
@ #@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@#@ -A woman accompanied her husband when he went for his annual checkup. While the patient was getting dressed, the doctor came in and said to the wife, "I don't like the way he looks." "Neither do I," she said, "but he's handy around the house."--Merritt K. Freeman in... Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, January 8, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
@@@@@@@@@$$$$$$$%%%%%@@@@##### What do PHD students eat when they're hungry? Academia nuts. Why should you always knock before opening the fridge door? In case there's a salad dressing. Why couldn't the sesame seed stop talking? He was on a roll. Why do prawns never share? Because they're shellfish.... Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, January 7, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
&^*^**^&&&&&&******^^^^^&&&&&&****^^^^&&&& Why aren’t dogs good dancers? Because they have two left feet. What’s a dog’s favorite homework assignment? A lab report. Why did Beethoven get rid of his chickens? All they said was, “Bach, Bach, Bach …” Of course I wouldn’t say anything about her unless I... Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, January 6, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
@ #$@#$@#$@#$@#$$@#$$@#$@#$@$@$$#$ Five pigs go into a bar. The first pigs orders a beer, drinks it, goes to bathroom and leaves. The second pig orders two beers, drinks both of them, goes to the bathroom and leaves. The third pig orders three beers, drinks them, goes to the bathroom and leaves. The... Sign in to see full entry.
Monday, January 5, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan! Since I'm Upset With The Latest Events...
The opposite of “pro” is “con,” so the opposite of progress is … Congress. Q: How many congressmen does it take to change a light bulb? A: Two—one to change the bulb and one to change it back again. The secret to making Congress more efficient is to replace all the people with horses. Sure, every... Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, January 4, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆▪︎¤☆ How does a farmer keep track of his cattle? With a cow-culator. What do you call an alligator detective? An investi-gator. What are spiders really good at? Surfing the web. What do you call a magic dog? A labracadabrador. How does a farmer keep track of... Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, January 3, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
@@@###$$$%%%@@@###$$$%%%@@@###$ Two lawyers were in a coffee shop talking. One of the lawyers names was Thomas Strange. After a while their conversation became rather morbid, and they started to started to talk about what they were going to have on their tomb stones. Thomas said the he wasn't going... Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, January 2, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩₩ My grandpa always said when one door closes, another one opens. Smart man, but a horrible cabinet maker. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. What do you call a factory that makes good products? Satisfactory. Why did the bicycle... Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, January 1, 2026
Here's Your Daily Groan!
{}{}■{}{}{}■{}{}{}■{}{}{}■{}{}{}■{}{}{}{}{}■{}{}{}{}■{}{}{}■ What did my doctor say to do after I stepped on LEGO? Just block out the pain. What has four wheels and eats LEGO bricks? The vacuum cleaner. Where do LEGO minifigures go on holiday? The Czech Repubrick. Why does a LEGO minifigure hate... Sign in to see full entry.