Start The Day With Laughter!!!

By sam444 - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Wednesday, July 22, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

They say Newton discovered gravity while quarantined during a plague. Big deal. I discovered vodka. — Rich Pliskin If you want to make sure another person loves you back, try picking a flower with an odd number of petals. — Brian Gutierrez Given the choice, I’ll bet Mary would have preferred an... Sign in to see full entry.

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Tuesday, July 21, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

Once during an adventure, a farmer named Bryan Clay stumbled into a cave and found a magic lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp, a Genie appeared and asked him what his wish was. The farmer told him that he wished he were very rich. The Genie said okay and asked him, "Alright Mr. Very Rich Clay, what is your... Sign in to see full entry.

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Monday, July 20, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

The wife and I took a long, leisurely drive out to the country and pulled over to fill up our car's gas tank and tires... She was surprised to see that the station had a fee to fill the tires and asked me, "Why in the world do they charge for AIR?!" I responded, "Inflation." An MIT linguistics... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by sam444 at 9:28 PM | add or view comments (5) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, July 19, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

The historians had gathered for a party in Cairo after they had discovered a new mummy. The discovered mummy, on display at the party hall, suddenly woke up. Seeing the historians alarmed, the mummy said that he just wanted to listen to some music. The mummy said, "Please don't play jazz because my... Sign in to see full entry.

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Saturday, July 18, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

Mother's Day. Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother's Day morning. As she lay there looking forward to breakfast in bed, the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen. But after a good long wait she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the... Sign in to see full entry.

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Friday, July 17, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

What did the traffic light say to the car? “Don’t look! I’m about to change.” What does a house wear? Address. What do you call a Viking who lost his boat? A Hiking. Why are trees so unreliable? They’re shady. My girlfriend left me because I’m “too arrogant.” I told her not to let the door hit her... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by sam444 at 8:18 PM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, July 16, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

What did the traffic light say to the car? “Don’t look! I’m about to change.” What does a house wear? Address. What do you call a Viking who lost his boat? A Hiking. Why are trees so unreliable? They’re shady. My girlfriend left me because I’m “too arrogant.” I told her not to let the door hit her... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by sam444 at 5:24 PM | add or view comments (5) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, July 15, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groaner!

"Well-behaved women seldom make history.” — Laurel Thatcher Ulrich “Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” — Robin Williams “If you can’t be kind, at least be vague.” — Judith Martin “I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not so sure.” — Maybe Christopher Hampton “In real life, I... Sign in to see full entry.

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Tuesday, July 14, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groan!

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” — A.A. Milne “I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me four days, but whatever.” — Unknown “I am not lazy. I am on energy-saving mode.” — Anonymous “My alone time is sometimes for your safety.” — Unknown “Always forgive your... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by sam444 at 5:10 PM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, July 13, 2026

Here's Your Daily Groan!

A man tells his doctor, “Help me. I’m addicted to Twitter!” The doctor replies, “Sorry, I don’t follow you…” Submitted by Christine Schrum Making a splash A husband texts his wife on a frosty winter morning: “Window’s frozen!” His wife texts back, “Pour lukewarm water over it.” Five minutes later he... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by sam444 at 4:37 PM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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