Oh no you didn't!

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Revenge is best served hidden

After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for a younger woman. The downtown luxury apartment was in his name and he wanted to remain there with his new love so he asked the wife to move out and then he would buy her another place. The wife agreed to this, but asked that she be given 3 days... Sign in to see full entry.

Just following the signs!

An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

A whole new meaning

A blonde was walking along, when she looked up to observe a bird flying overhead. Suddenly, the bird drops a load when it was directly over her. The blonde says, "Good thing I had my mouth open, or that would've hit me right in the face!" Sign in to see full entry.

I can read the signs

A blonde was driving down the highway to Disneyland when he saw a sign that said "DISNEYLAND LEFT". After thinking for a minute, he said to himself "oh well!" and turned around and drove home. On his way home, the same blonde drove past another sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS EIGHT MILES". By the... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 12, 2012

Santa

The santa set gets very warm at times. Santa has on that heavy costume...mix the 2 and you get problems. Santa keeps dozing off on the set. What makes matters worse is that he is hard of hearing. Last year when Santa would fall asleep we would take a picture of him and that usually woke him. This... Sign in to see full entry.

Mirror Mirror

There were two blondes walking down the street and they spotted a compact. They rushed over to see who it belonged to so they could return it. The first one opens it and says, "This person looks familiar". The second one says, "Let me see." She looks at her friend and says, "Silly, that's me!" Sign in to see full entry.

Who says you have to be smart to get into MIT?

These are actual student evaulation comments taken from an MIT course evaluation guide in the fall semester of 1991. "This class was a religious experience for me... I had to take it all on faith." "Text makes a satisfying `thud' when dropped on the floor." "The class is worthwhile because I need it... Sign in to see full entry.

Honest Johnny

Mother asks little Johnny, as they wait for the bus, to tell the driver he is 4 years old when asked because he will ride for free. As they get into the bus the driver asks Johnny how old he was. "I am 4 years old". "And when will you be six years old?" asks the driver. “When I get off the bus"... Sign in to see full entry.

Clever!

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, November 11, 2012

ASk a stupid question...

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information" "To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again.... Sign in to see full entry.

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