Are you an outcast? I hope so. I would like to think that my audience is jampacked with outcasts. I would like to think that I have an audience period, but if I'm the only audience member in my audience, then that's okay, because I myself am an outcast. Plain and simply put, I'm not plain or simple.... Sign in to see full entry.
If there is a possibility of time travel, or if there ever is, it would only stand to reason that we currently have visitors from the future here right now. Maybe they are all around us. Whoa, I'm freaking myself out. Maybe that stockmarket tycoon is a time traveler from the year 2087 and he came... Sign in to see full entry.
I have a lot of really good ideas on what to write about here on Blogit when I'm lying in bed. The problem is, once I'm vertical, all those good ideas travel down towards my abdomen and die within eight minutes, because they're eight minute abs. So I just wanted to let you know that you're really... Sign in to see full entry.
This one's dedicated to those who've never had anything dedicated to them before. This one goes out to all the inside people... or it stays in, rather. This is for those people that never get remembered in acceptance speeches - Thank you, uh... whatever-your-name-is. To all the little people who get... Sign in to see full entry.
Do you remember When? I'm talkin' back when life gave lemons and people opened lemonade stands to stand on and get their vocal voices heard. The Simpletons today claim that those were 'Simple Times'. They say life is much more complicated today. But back when this Now was that Now, people thought... Sign in to see full entry.
"Don't taunt the tiger," is a warning I never thought would be necessary when in the presence of one. It's kind of like "warning: this coffee is hot." "Warning: do not repeatedly stab yourself in the eye with scissors." Well I'll be fuct if I wasn't about to do just that. It's a good thing you were... Sign in to see full entry.
Your personality wasn't the problem. You had a great sense of humor; laughing at everything up to and including the funeral procession we passed on our way to the Taxidermists Convention. And, no, such an event isn't necessarily a bad place to go on a first date... necessarily. I might have chosen... Sign in to see full entry.
If you're here for a laugh, then on your behalf -- behold. Nana hand knitted you a sweater. She's on a fixed income and she's on some heavy medication as well, so be grateful. And though she knows that you have a fear of clowns, don't take it personally. She's helping you to confront your fears,... Sign in to see full entry.
Grandpa has been drinking too much cough medicine again. The guy is such a pervert when it's all said and done. He's always thinking about sex. He cashes in those cans and bottles for what? Hookers and Robitussin -- that's it. Half the time the hookers turn him down, because necrophilia is against... Sign in to see full entry.
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