Thinking Out Loud.

By CunningLinguist - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Opinion

Thursday, January 5, 2006

Hey Bloggers

I'm trying something new, hoping you'll come along for the ride. I've been working on a short story that started out as a short story but ended up being a stubborn, pain in the ass, refusing to conclude itself like any good short story should. To make a long story short, I'm just going to go where... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 8:39 AM | add or view comments (14) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, January 2, 2006

Freaky Phenomena

There are some unanswerable questions in this universe of ours. Things Kings and pawns ponder from here to eternity or forever -- whichever comes first. Here's one that continues to allude me: how come when you're eating your own bowl of cereal and it eventually gets soggy, you have no problem... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 12:47 PM | add or view comments (11) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, December 31, 2005

A Message to Bloggers. Yeah, YOU

Pop the cork and rain the champagne! All you crazy little blogger types have the bestest 2006 in the history of all 2006s!! It just occurred to me, a lot of you are in different time zones -- isn't that fuckin' cool?! Australians are already hung over and collecting their underwear from ceiling fans... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 3:34 PM | add or view comments (9) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Uncensored Astrological Reading (grim repost)

Aries: (March 21 - April 20) You selfish prick. So busy looking out for number one, you inevitably step in number two. You're a hot-headed, impulsive, inpatient, jump-the-gun, Mother Superior. All of your friends are imaginary. If you had any real friends, they might advise you to look before you... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 2:06 PM | add or view comments (12) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

UNNEWSUAL

A man in Tuscaloosa is suing the production of Little Orphan Annie on the grounds that the lead character quite definitively stated that the sun would come out tomorrow, and it didn't. The Defense says Annie's forecast is still pending, stating that it's not tomorrow yet, it's still today. We'll let... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 10:10 AM | add or view comments (14) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Wow, Things Have Changed

A guy kills his mother, then travels to a neighbor's house and kills three people there, then kills himself and they say he might have been mentally ill? Yeah, the jury's still out on that one. What criteria is necessary for mental instability to be conclusive? "Following the slaughter of his mom... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 9:46 AM | add or view comments (22) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, December 12, 2005

I Can't Think of a Title for This One

I get a kick out of movie trailers that squeeze in what critics had to say about the flick as long as it's positive. " The Springfield Circle - Jerk Times said '________ is an Oscar-worthy escapade, fraught with whimsical whimsicality and enchanting exuberance.'" Every movie does this now! They must... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 9:10 AM | add or view comments (23) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, December 5, 2005

"Jesus Was A Cross-dresser"

I noticed that if you have a controversial title it gets you more clicks. I'm observant like that. So, "If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.” - George Carlin I'm actually a big fan of the man called Jesus. I stand for most of the things that he stood for, only I do so from a seated... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 8:59 AM | add or view comments (35) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, December 1, 2005

Santa in Graceland

I can't believe that Santa Claus is still alive! He was an old man when I was knee-high to an elf (sorry -- little person). You ever notice how much Santa Claus looks like God? But Santa has a weight problem, and that makes his longevity all the more impressive. He works his way around this whole... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 9:03 AM | add or view comments (21) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

This Doesn't Belong in the "Opinions" Section, In My Opinion

When I was in the sanitarium for talking to people who weren't there, one of the people who was actually there was a guy who called himself Saint Nick the Sanitarium Santa. Nick used to break into people's houses the night before Christma s and take everybody's presents. He would put coal and... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by CunningLinguist at 8:24 AM | add or view comments (13) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

About this Blog

I sit up here, taking up space in my spaceship, while observing planet earth with all its quirky whats, whatnots, and what-have-yous, and I attempt to solve all the world's problems with mental duct tape and saran wrap. The solutions to all the wurl's woes can be found here in cryptic candy coding. (Like The Da Vinci Code starring Forrest Gump.) If you can't see the answers, your questioning comes into question.

Recent Entries
People
Blogs
Links

Headlines (What is this?)