Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Sunday, February 16, 2014

where do you live?

YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA WHEN - - 1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house. 2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone. 3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. 4. You know how to eat an artichoke. 5. You drive to your... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, February 13, 2014

golf instructions

At the first hole on a golf course, a man tees off and hits a hard drive, but the ball hooks badly and goes off the course entirely. The man figures it's a lost ball, puts another ball down and starts again. He plays nine holes when a policeman comes up to him: "Sir, did you lose a ball a while... Sign in to see full entry.

now that's friendship

A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day. That night, one hunter retuned alone, staggering under an eight-point buck. “Where is Mike?” asked another hunter. “He fainted a couple of miles up the trail,” Mike’s partner answered. “You left him lying there alone and... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

snow plow

One winter morning while listening to the radio, Bob and his wife hear the announcer say, "We are going to have 4-6 inches of snow today. You must park your car on the even numbered side of the street, so the snowplow can get through." Bob's wife goes out and moves her car. A week later while they... Sign in to see full entry.

11 women

Eleven women were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount Everest. Ten were blonde, one was a brunette. As a group they decided that one of the party should let go. If that didn't happen the rope would break and everyone would perish. For an... Sign in to see full entry.

boom!

Boom! Was that me!? Oncer there was three men in an airplaine (White, Chinese, and Mexican) and were throwing out the door things that they had in adbundence in their countries. The Chinese opened the door of the plane and threw an cabbage. Later the mexican stepped up and threw an orange and... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

biking

Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill. It took forever to get to the top. When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "whew, that was so hard." The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards.” Sign in to see full entry.

water moccasin

Old Bubba was fishing along the Bayou for catfish one day when he spots a water moccasin slithering across the water with a toad in its mouth. Being a longtime fisherman, he knows the best bait for large catfish are toads. In a flash, Bubba grabs the snake from behind and carefully removes the toad... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, February 10, 2014

diehard golfers

Two golfers met at the club. "I heard about your terrible tragedy last week," said one. "Yes," said the other sadly, sipping his drink. "I was playing a two-some with Winthrop, and he dropped dead on the ninth hole." "I understand you carried him all the way back to the clubhouse too," the first man... Sign in to see full entry.

golfing 2

Preacher decides to skip Sunday services and go to the golf course to hit a few... When he gets there, he discovers there isn't anybody else around, and he has the entire course to himself.. But he does have witnesses...Seems God and Jesus are keeping an eye on him, and they don't approve of his... Sign in to see full entry.