Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

God's Infinite Wisdom!

God created the donkey & said to him: “You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence & you will live 50 years. You will be a donkey. “The donkey answered: “I will be a donkey, but to live 50 years is too much. Give... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

dr dr

A doctor calls his patient and says; the check you gave me for my bill came back. The patient replied: So did my arthritis! Sign in to see full entry.

Fluffy and the doughnuts

Someone made a comment about the one liner comebacks from cops and it reminded me of a joke from Gabriel Iglesias. Very funny and does some awesome sound effects. I usually am ROFLMAO. So here is a link to share what happened to him one time when he went to buy doughnuts...... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, March 23, 2014

pay day

One day, an employee received an unusually large check. She decided not to say anything about it. The following week, her check was for less that the normal amount, and she confronted her boss. “How come,” the supervisor inquired, “you didn’t say anything when you were overpaid?” Unperturbed, the... Sign in to see full entry.

HR posting

Notice to Employees (Includes Temporary and Part Time Staff) SICKNESS We will no longer accept your doctors' notes as proof. We believe if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to work. LEAVE OF ABSENCE FOR SURGERY We are no longer allowing this practice. As long as you are employed here,... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

hey officer!

The following 15 Police Comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country. Count down to #1... #15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while." # 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a... Sign in to see full entry.

vacation

Mr. and Mrs. Thorne had just reached the airport in the nick of time to catch the plane for their two-week's vacation in Majorca. "I wish we'd brought the piano with us," said Mr. Thorne. "What on earth for?" asked his wife. "I've left the tickets on it." Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, March 21, 2014

job hunting lingo

Part I WHAT THE NEW JOB-LINGO REALLY MEANS by Dede Molter "JOIN OUR FAST-PACED COMPANY": We have no time to train you. "CASUAL WORK ATMOSPHERE": We don't pay enough to expect that you'll dress up; well, a couple of the real daring guys wear earrings. "MUST BE DEADLINE ORIENTED": You'll be six months... Sign in to see full entry.

heaven!

Once upon a time, there was a cat that died. When she got to heaven, God asked her how she liked being on earth. She told the Lord that it was awful -- she had to sleep in cold black alleys, where there was no food and life was hard. God told her that he was sorry it had had turned out that way --... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

drunks

There was this little guy sitting in a bar, drinking his beer, minding his own business when all of a sudden this great big dude comes in and -- WHACK!! -- knocks him off the bar stool and onto the floor. The big dude says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." The little guy thinks "GEEZ," but he... Sign in to see full entry.