diapers
Why did the woman only change her baby’s diaper once a month? On the package it read "good for up to 15 pounds" Sign in to see full entry.
Monday, February 24, 2014
Sunday, February 23, 2014
Playing with words
Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay, they’d by bagels Q. What do you call a ginger bread man with one leg? A. Limp biscuit Sign in to see full entry.
church isn't what it used to be
A drunk was staggering down the main street of town. Somehow, he managed to make it up the stairs to the cathedral and into the building, where he crashed from pew to pew. He finally made his way to a side aisle and into a confessional. A priest had been observing the man's sorry progress. Figuring... Sign in to see full entry.
cats and dogs
A dog thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... They must be Gods! A cat thinks: Hey, these people I live with feed me, love me, provide me with a nice warm, dry house, pet me, and take good care of me... I... Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, February 22, 2014
ain't love grand?
“May I go swimming, Mommy?” “No, you may not. There are sharks here.” “But Daddy’s swimming.” “He’s insured.” Sign in to see full entry.
your uncle
Tim asked Bob “What happened to your uncle’s boat?” “Ever notice that big rock at the entrance to the Golden Gate?” said Bob. “Yes, I have” replied Tim. “Well, he didn’t” said Bob. Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, February 16, 2014
football
Q:Why did the football coach go to the bank? A:He wanted to get his quarter-back!!! Sign in to see full entry.
great ball of fire!
Dad: "What happened to your eye?" Tom: "I was staring at a ball from afar, and I was wondering why it was getting bigger and bigger. Then, it hit me." R Sign in to see full entry.
where do you live?
YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA WHEN - - 1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house. 2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone. 3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway. 4. You know how to eat an artichoke. 5. You drive to your... Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, February 13, 2014
golf instructions
At the first hole on a golf course, a man tees off and hits a hard drive, but the ball hooks badly and goes off the course entirely. The man figures it's a lost ball, puts another ball down and starts again. He plays nine holes when a policeman comes up to him: "Sir, did you lose a ball a while... Sign in to see full entry.