Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

groaner

I think everybody misses the groaners....so without further ado... A corny talk on the farm... Do you know what the lettuce asked the radish? Let us be best friends? And what did the radish answer? You naughty thing, you make me blush! you make me reddish Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 8:53 PM | add or view comments (6) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

parameters

"Just to establish some parameters," said the professor, "Mr. Nichols, what is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," said the student. "And the opposite of depression, Ms. Biggs?" "Elation." "And you, sir, how about the opposite of woe?" "I believe that would be giddy up..." Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 7:11 AM | add or view comments (10) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

doctor's speech

A Doctor was addressing a large audience in Tampa.. 'The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Soft drinks corrode your stomach lining.. Chinese food is loaded with MSG. High fat diets can be disastrous, and none of us... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 7:08 AM | add or view comments (6) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, January 12, 2015

antiques

A man not knowledgeable of antiques, or their history, was standing next to a woman who was looking at a century old painting. As she stood admiring the priceless painting she said to the man that the painting went back to Louie The Fourteenth. The man replied to her that that was nothing, that he... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 10:54 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

First day

Jim, a collections specialist, was on his first day of work for his new employer and was assigned to collect a past due balance from a company that was a customer of his employer. He had been provided with a standard script that he was to use where he was to ask for "Accounts Payable" when calling... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 10:40 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, January 11, 2015

down the hole

Two guys were sitting in a double hole outhouse doing their business, when #1 gets through and pulling up his pants, a quarter falls out of his pocket and falls into the depths of the hole. As they both peer down the hole, #1 pulls out his wallet and throws a 20 dollar into the hole. "What did you... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 8:00 AM | add or view comments (11) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

i want to be...

A guy wants to become a magician so he goes out and buys a magician book. Later he gathers his family around the living room for his first trick. Reading his new book he reaches into a bag and pulls out a hammer and to the amazement of his family hits himself in the head with it. He's unconscious... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 7:59 AM | add or view comments (8) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Friday, January 9, 2015

groaner

Brian was dating Lorraine and they were very close. While they were dating he met another woman named Clearly and wanted to start dating her but felt that he should be faithful to Lorraine. So he continued to date Lorraine. One day Brian took Lorraine on a walk in the woods by the river. As they... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 8:29 PM | add or view comments (8) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

why are you crying

An old man walks into a bar, sits down, and starts crying. The bartender asks, “What’s wrong?” The old man looks at the bartender through Teary eyes and between sobs says, “I married a beautiful woman two days ago. She’s a natural blonde, twenty-five, intelligent, a marvelous cook, a meticulous... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 8:28 PM | add or view comments (2) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, January 8, 2015

please listen

A stage mother cornered the concert violinist in his dressing room and insisted he listen to a tape of her talented son playing the violin. The man agreed to listen, and the woman switched on the tape player. “What music’” the violinist thought. A difficult piece, but played with such genius that it... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 7:31 AM | add or view comments (8) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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humorous tales from my life and jokes that I think will make you laugh

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