Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

blonde plays trivia pursuit

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was: "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off? Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, July 16, 2016

bank robberies

According to the FBI, most modern-day bank robberies are "unsophisticated and unprofessional crimes," committed by young male repeat offenders who apparently don't know the first thing about their business. This information was included in an interesting, amusing article titles "How Not to Rob a... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, July 12, 2016

ordering ie cream'

A little old man shuffled slowly into the 'Orange Dipper', an ice cream parlor in Naples, and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool. After catching his breath he ordered a banana split. The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts?' 'No,' he replied, 'hemorrhoids' Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, July 9, 2016

losing weight

An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run 10 miles a day for 30 days. This, he promised, would help her lose as much as twenty pounds. The blonde follows the doctor's advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she'd indeed lost twenty... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, July 7, 2016

blondes!

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blonde cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun and his boots, so he arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up, he asks "Why in the world are you walking around like this?" The Cowboy says,... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

blonde on a farm

Amy, a blonde city girl, marries a farmer. One morning, on his way out to the fields, the farmer says to Amy, "The artificial insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today. I drove a nail into the two-by-four just above the cow's stall in the barn. You show him where the cow is... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, July 3, 2016

blonde and her bmw

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the story?" He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor" She asks, "How often do I have to do that?" wait for it kabu...... yeah! Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, July 2, 2016

I won!

A blonde goes into a coffee shop and notices there's a "peel and win" sticker on her coffee cup. So she peels it off and starts screaming, "I've won a motorhome! I've won a motorhome!" The waitress says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize is a free Lunch.?" But the blonde keeps on screaming,... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, July 1, 2016

milk bath

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. So he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

yr in review

January - Took her new scarf back to the store because it was too tight. February - Couldn't work in a pharmacy because the bottles wouldn't fit into the typewriter. March - Got excited when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months because the box said "2-4 years." April - Was trapped on an... Sign in to see full entry.