Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Sunday, June 12, 2016

blonde victim

WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (the actual AP headline) Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her inlaws, and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries. Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, June 10, 2016

blonde cooking

MONDAY: It's fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls. TUESDAY: Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn't dress. What a surprise when Tom brought... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, June 9, 2016

interview

The Local sheriff was looking for a new deputy. When a blonde walks in to try for the job, he asks her "Okay, what is 1 and 1?" "Eleven", she replies. The sheriff thinks to himself, "That's not what I wanted, but I guess she's right!" "What two days of the week begin with the letter T?" he asks.... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

organic

My wife asked me to buy ORGANIC vegetables from the market. I went and looked around and couldn't find any. So I grabbed an old, tired looking employee and said, "These vegetables are for my wife. Have they been sprayed with any poisonous chemicals?" "The produce guy looked at me and said, "No.... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, June 6, 2016

truckstop dining

A trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards." The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires,... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, June 5, 2016

who wants to be a millionaire?

A contestant on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire" had reached the final plateau. If she answered the next question correctly, she would win$1,000,000. If she answered incorrectly, she would pocket only the $32,000 milestone money. As she suspected it would be, the million- dollar question was no... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, June 3, 2016

drinking

When asked by their host if she would like another drink, the attractive blonde bowed her head slightly and said, "No thank you. My husband limits me to one drink." "Why is that," the host asked? Her reply... "Because after one drink I can feel it; after two drinks...anyone can!" Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

traveling

A couple of rednecks went on vacation in Colorado. They flew to Denver and rented a car to sight see. One of the sights was a bridge that was more than 1,000 feet above the river. Walking out onto the bridge, they noticed it swaying in the wind. "I don't think I want to drive the car across this... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, May 28, 2016

blondes!

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead show up for the same job interview. The brunette is the first one to go in, and after filling out the forms and going through the questions, the interviewer decides to ask her last question: "How many D's are there in "INDIANA JONES""? The brunette thinks for a... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, May 27, 2016

2 engineers

Two engineering students meet on campus one day. The first engineer calls out to the other, "Hey -- Nice bike! Where did you get it?" "Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young co-ed rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and... Sign in to see full entry.