"Brief Encounters"

Leaving Woolstreet House. Bruce's Home.(I was not 'finishing therapy-he was moving house.) His house was hidden away in a 'woody copse'-a most delightful-peaceful setting! WOOLSTREET HOUSE April 3rd.2000 I enter this room-this 'sanctuary'-the caretaker of my Soul-- for the last time! The 'closed'... Sign in to see full entry.

RANDOM DIARY ENTRIES End of March 2000 I have been 'selected' to take part in a Channel 4 television film.It feels as if-because I have been selected-I have to comply.Now that I am in therapy I am vulnerable and I no longer have the tools to cope with any major occurrence.Previously my anger made it... Sign in to see full entry.

This one is of the same 'mood' as the previous poem. MY SEARCH FOR MUMMY March 2000 Child-stop searching for your 'mummy'-for she won't answer when you call-- she's dead and gone! When she was there-in your early days-she wasn't 'mothering' you in Spirit or in Soul. Lay the ghost-and move on. I hear... Sign in to see full entry.

There is a great deal of anxiety within me at the present time! I feel there are two of me. The inside me thinks-feels and behaves in one way. The outside me faces the world and behaves in a totally different way from that of my inside world.It feels like I am in the middle of my worst nightmare!... Sign in to see full entry.

As Bruce so often says-each time we 'go back'-we are doing so from a different angle and this time-I found the baby in me! I MET THE BABY INSIDE February 25th. 2000 Today I travelled far and deep inside again- raked amongst the ashes and the roots. I never really thought that I would find remains-... Sign in to see full entry.

Needless to say I could not have experienced any of this 'rewind' of my past life without my therapist--my 'significant other!' Also-he was about to 'move home'! MY THERAPIST'S ROOM February 11th. 2000 The 'Cradle' of freedom to safely explore-the pathways I've travelled upon. Space-set aside-where... Sign in to see full entry.

Until now-I never grieved for the Baby I lost in 1974. I felt that it was God's punishment upon me-for all my wrong doings! LITTLE BLUE BABY January 31st.2000 Little Blue Baby-it's long overdue-my thoughts and my feelings so raw. I searched through my memories and came across you-yes you-little... Sign in to see full entry.

I feel that it is vital-that some form of intervention and recovery work is established as soon as possible for children recognised as having disturbed backgrounds! Without ever being shown the appropriate way to behave for example-or the right pathway to take-the future is nothing but a huge maze... Sign in to see full entry.

This is an extremely difficult transitional time for me.On the one hand I am trying to follow advice and guidance as to what is best for my youngest Son's welfare.On the other hand-or possibly because of this-I am breaking Bruce's boundaries-unintentionally.My emotions are absolutely everywhere.Part... Sign in to see full entry.

So much has arisen in therapy during tis past three or four weeks.It was the eighth anniversary of my open heart surgery on the 15th.October 1999.It was also the anniversary of the start of ICAIR on the same day! Then I had to rush Fred into hospital with terrible stomach pains. Hence the next... Sign in to see full entry.