Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Monday, December 2, 2013

condoms slogans

1. Capmbell's Soup Condoms: Mmm, mmmm, good... 2. Coca Cola Condoms: the real thing. 3. Diet pepsi Condoms: You got the right one, baby. 4. Double Mint: Double your pleasure, Double your fun! 5. Energizer: It keeps going and going and going... 6. Ford condoms: the best never Rest. 7. Hewlett Packard... Sign in to see full entry.

He got it right!

A man to his friend: "At my house I always say the last word". His friend: "What is the word?" The man: "I am sorry. Forgive me" Sign in to see full entry.

Senior Moment at its finest

(This is supposedly a true account recorded in the Police Log of Sarasota, Florida) An elderly Florida lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her car, found four males in the act of leaving with her vehicle. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at the top of... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, December 1, 2013

me thinks he won't make it

A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He asks, 'What are you doing?' She answers, 'I'm moving to Nevada. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free.' Later that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom & sees her husband... Sign in to see full entry.

love those veggies

A beautiful woman loved growing tomatoes, but couldn't seem to get her tomatoes to turn red. One day, while taking a stroll, she came upon a gentleman neighbor who had the most beautiful garden full of huge red tomatoes. The woman asked the gentlemen,"What do you do to get your tomatoes so red?" The... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 29, 2013

Clinic

Bill and Bob, two children, were sitting outside a clinic. Bill happened to be crying very loudly. "Why are you crying?" Bob asked. "I came here for a blood test," sobbed Bill. "So? Are you afraid?" "No. For the blood test, they cut my finger. As Bob heard this, he immediately began crying... Sign in to see full entry.

Worm

A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy finds an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, "Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole." The grandfather replies, "I'll bet you five dollars you can't. It's too wiggly and limp to put back in... Sign in to see full entry.

Bob doesn't have a clue!

Bob says to Lester, "You know, I reckon I'm about ready for a vacation, only this year I'm gonna do it a little different. The last few years, I took your advice as to where to go. Two years ago you said to go to Hawaii, I went to Hawaii, and Marie got pregnant. Then last year, you told me to go to... Sign in to see full entry.

What do you think ladies?

How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will never Be able to support you. Why do women have smaller feet than men? So they can... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Graves

A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way through the cemetery back to the car, the little girl asked, "Mommy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?" "Of course not, dear," replied the mother. "Why would you think that?" "The... Sign in to see full entry.