Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Monday, July 14, 2014

watch it!

Two drunken men were driving home. The first started screaming: - Jim, watch out for the wall, watch out for the waaaaall! Baaaaam! They hit the wall. The next day in the hospital the first man asked his friend: - You good for nothing, I've been screaming for you to watch out, why didn't you? Jim... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 5:08 AM | add or view comments (8) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

hey barkeep!

A man enters his local bar holding a frog and an iguana. He sets them down on the bar and says to the bartender, "I bet you $1000 that my frog here can sing any song you can think of." "Ok," says the bartender. "How 'bout 'Blue Moon'?" The man whispers something to the frog, and the frog starts... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 5:07 AM | add or view comments (7) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, July 13, 2014

open up!

A bar owner locked up his place at 2 AM and went home to sleep. He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone rang. “What time do you open up in the morning?” he heard an obviously inebriated man inquire. The owner was so furious, he slammed down the receiver and went back to bed. A few... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 4:09 AM | add or view comments (9) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

taxi ride

Three drunks hailed a taxi. The taxi driver seeing that they were so wasted when they got in, he just switched on the engine and switched it off, and said we are here. The 1st guy gave him money, 2nd guy said thanks, but the 3rd guy slapped him. The taxi driver was stunned because he was hoping that... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 4:08 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Friday, July 11, 2014

flying

A man went to the airline counter. The ticket agent asked, "Sir, do you have reservations?" He replied, "Reservations? Of course I have reservations, but I'm flying anyway." Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 1:17 AM | add or view comments (12) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

carrying a child

A mother carefully explained to her young daughter how children were created. She used the expression “carrying a child” instead of “pregnant,” but the girl seemed satisfied. Sometime later, a terrible fire broke out in the neighborhood, and the girl stood by watching. Here is how she described the... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 1:15 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

loooool

“Now my motto in life,” said the school chaplain, “is work hard, play hard and pray hard. How about you, Harriet?” “My motto is let bygones be bygones.” “That’s good. Why did you choose that?” “Then I wouldn’t have to take any history classes!” Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 12:19 AM | add or view comments (10) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

puns to you

A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it’s two tired. Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 12:17 AM | add or view comments (5) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, July 7, 2014

blonde golfer

Did you hear about the golfer trying to buy a new golf club? He looked at club after club after club. His friend asked him "Why are you taking so long?" He replied "I am looking for a hole in one!" Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 10:20 PM | add or view comments (5) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

pun time

How did the violin greet the guitar? Cello!! Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 10:20 PM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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humorous tales from my life and jokes that I think will make you laugh

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