Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, December 8, 2016

Sexism

1.The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with no hard feelings. 2.Nothing improves with age. 3.No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it, because it'll never be quite the same again. 4.Sex has no calories. 5.Sex takes up the least amount of... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 9:39 PM | add or view comments (13) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

what do you get...

I heard this joke on the radio.... What do you get when you put cabbage patch kids through the shredder? Cole slaw kids Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 11:52 AM | add or view comments (6) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

efficiency experts

I took some friends out to dinner last week, and I noticed a spoon in the shirt pocket of our waiter as he handed us the menus. It seemed a little odd, but I dismissed it as a random thing. Until our busboy came with water & tableware; he too, sported a spoon in his breast pocket. I looked around... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 8:01 AM | add or view comments (9) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, December 5, 2016

preggers

A man and his wife were making their first doctor visit prior to the birth of their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife's stomach with indelible ink. The couple was curious about what the stamp was for, so when they got home, he dug out his... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 11:49 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, December 4, 2016

practicing

A neighbor was watching a little boy playing with a ball and bat in his backyard. "I'm the greatest hitter in the world" the boy exclaimed as he threw the ball into the air. He swung with all his might but missed the ball and fell down himself. "Strike One" he says as he gets up. He throws it up... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 4:36 PM | add or view comments (6) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

new defs part 2

The Washington Post asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners. Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one letter altered to form a real word. Some are... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 10:11 AM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, December 3, 2016

word inventions

The Washington Post asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners. Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one letter altered to form a real word. Some are... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 9:31 AM | add or view comments (6) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Friday, December 2, 2016

life...gotta love it!

I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it. I work hard because millions on welfare depend on me! I used to have a handle on life, but it broke. Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me. Beauty is in the eye of the... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 6:40 AM | add or view comments (7) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, December 1, 2016

what do you think?

I had amnesia once - or twice. Protons have mass? I didn't even know they were Catholic. All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy. I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. If the world was a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle. What is a "free" gift? Aren't all... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 5:46 AM | add or view comments (8) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, November 29, 2016

life's philosophies from web

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. I'm not into working out. My philosophy is no pain, no pain. I'm in shape. Round is a shape. I'm desperately trying to figure out why Kamikaze pilots wore helmets. I've always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by Annicita at 9:39 AM | add or view comments (13) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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humorous tales from my life and jokes that I think will make you laugh

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