Saturday, October 15, 2005
A Blind Man in a Ladies Bar
A Blind man in a ladies bar..... A blind man enters a "Ladies Bar" by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice,...
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Sunday, October 2, 2005
No Spekka da English
No Spekka da English A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come...
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Wednesday, September 21, 2005
The Cowboy
The Cowboy A lady went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen. The woman asked the cowboy if it's true what they say about men with big feet. The cowboy grinned and said, "Shore is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to...
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Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Wax Hair Removal-- Ya gotta Read This one
All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy, painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the wax. My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home fix dinner, played with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind...
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Sunday, August 21, 2005
A Week of Hell
There is soooooooooooo much to tell you all that I will post soon. I have to type my statement right now and will post it later. With actual names changed later. Commie will soon be in black and white stripes.
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Thursday, August 4, 2005
Questions that really need Answers
Questions that really need answers... 1. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" 2 Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt." 3. Why is...
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Sunday, June 5, 2005
Money
MONEY.... It can buy a House But not a Home It can buy a Bed But not Sleep It can buy a Clock But not Time It can buy a Book But not Knowledge It can buy a Position But not Respect It can buy Medicine But not Health It can buy Blood But not Life It can buy sex But not Love Money isn't everything....
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Saturday, May 7, 2005
Dinner Out
A married couple was sitting in a fine restaurant when the wife looks over at a nearby table and sees a man in a drunken stupor. The husband asks, "I notice you've been watching that man for some time now. Do you know him?" "Yes" she replies, "He's my ex-husband, and has been drinking like that...
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Saturday, April 23, 2005
Confessions
" Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman." The priest asks, "Is that you, little Timmy Shaughnessy?" "Yes, Father, it is." "And, who was the woman you were with?" "I can't be tellin' you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation." "Well, Timmy, I'm sure to find out...
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Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Girls Night Out
Imagine that you go out one night to a really nice bar with your friends and have a few cocktails. They taste good, so you have a few more and then the DJ puts on 'I Will Survive,' so you're off on the dance floor, a bit worse for wear. After an hour or so, when 'Heart of Glass' has finished, and...
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