Evolutionary Theory of Farts

Saturday, October 15, 2005

The Next Step

Fartology is a relatively new science and this particular post is to encourage our youngsters, those interested in science (particularly in gas physics and chemistry) to consider a career in Fartology. Dedicating your life to the exploration of farts, past and present, is most rewarding and has a... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, October 8, 2005

Fart Gas Fossils

A little known fact is that some clouds are actually fossilized farts. Didn't know that, did you? They have been around for many millenia, alternating being in the sky, in caves and even absorbed temporarily into large bodies of water. Such clouds have the characteristics of being much smaller than... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Good manners killed

and the farters survived. This is part of how evolution works. Those who held farts to avoid embarrassment and who were only able to allow themselves to fart when they were alone suffered gastro-intestinal system enlargement due to the excessive gas being held in. This stressed the large intestine,... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

Flaired Farts in Ancient Times

A surprising discovery from my most recent Fart Expedition uncovered a surprising fart molecular structure. The molecular structure of farts has evolved into tapered molecular shapes, allowing farts to worm their way into almost any opening. This one evolved characteristic, taper3ed fart molecules,... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Sorry for the fartlapses . . .

I've been conducting experiments and reviewing reports from archaeological sites. It seems that farts almost did not formulate as a part of man's physiology. There are DNA markers in our blood today, and a rare few people have such capabilities, that allow the blood to function as a cleanser en... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 7, 2005

Photo of the Phartologist at work at the Norfolk Zoo . . . .

I visit the zoo often to observe how modern creatures fart and then try to compare that with fossil remains. The following is me on one of those observation visits to our local zoo. Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, August 6, 2005

Special Fossils . . .

Very rare and much sought after fart fossils are those that depict a fart in the process of being farted. In order for this two happen, of course, the fart would have to have been one of the last things that creature did. Determining such a fossil, see fart fossil descriptions in an earlier addition... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, August 3, 2005

It has been surmised . . .

That mankind's earliest music was fart-based. Toot-tooting in the caves may have been a comfortable sound to those on the way back to the cave; they knew they were close when they heard the man-made rumbles, then they, too, joined in to add to the joy. With the variety of foods from the wild, much... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, July 31, 2005

Some Scents Backfire . . .

Farts were an important part of evolutionary survival in many of the smaller, weaker pre-historic animals. The scents were unpleasant to many predators, so they kept away from those awful farters. (You may know people like that in your office or classrooms.) Some scents, however, attracted... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, July 30, 2005

Farting as part of Social Evolution

Farting began as soon as anal canals were formed, for all practical purposes. Farts before then were pseudo farts created by the release of waste gases from various orifices, often mere “bubbles” within a cell that had worked their way to the surface. It was kind of equivalent to a person who could... Sign in to see full entry.

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