https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/This is a pseudo-scientific, wholly-fun look at fartshourly12000-01-01T12:00+00:00https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/621290This has happened before. My Fart Research Project has unearthed much evidence that catastrophes such as those expected in 2012 are part of an ongoing fart cycle. the Mayan scientists were the first to discover that farts are cyclic in nature and that at certain times in these fart cycles,...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/606133After a bit more research, I discovered that there were hard and soft farts, all purely gaseous, yet different in chemical make-up. I'll not go into the complex chemistry here, though you may want to think about it and derive the formulae. Hard farts are more readily fossilized, thus the name,...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/599868During the ice age Early Man had it difficult in the farting arena. Farts contain moisture and sometimes froze on their way out if the person was not near the camp fire or really well covered by fur around the butt-hole area of his body. This would often change a hunter's SBD into a noisy SBD as...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/586839Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:"";...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/585022Compatibility of fart gases has, by the data I have collected and assimilated, been an important factor in natural selection. I call it my natural gas theory of evolution. Men and women will just not sleep with someone whose farts they cannot stand. If forced to do so, the amor is deflated by the...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/582333There was a large, ghastly explosion in my fart research lab last night. I forgot about the candles as I was examining a pristine fart I had collected in the far outer reaches of inner Mongolia, a fart that dated to the early 2000's BCE. A fart, I might add, that no longer exists as a result of...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/581188Not to gross any of you out, but this is, after all, a lab topic, I respond to the question of how are fossils of gaseous farts formed. The one word answer is, "Skidders." We all know what skidders are, and if we are the ones doing laundry, we dread them. Well that is what skidders are. Need I...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/579217More in-depth research is required, but I do believe I have found evidence of farts being used to communicate in and between social circles in the distant past. Prior to the full development of language in humans, farts were the primary means of what might be called "back-talk." It was more or...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/575248A most interesting Romanian study, based on a much earlier study from Transylvania College in Kentucky, indicates that farts may be catching, you may catch farts from others around you. This study is most important because a fart epidemic could well wipe out a family, or even a town. Death by...https://www.blogit.com/Blogs/Blog.aspx/ArchieFart/574708I have constructed a computer program that models fart situations and am beginning a line of research that will re-create the first fart, which contrary to popular belief was not the Big Bang of stellar antiquity. Farts, to be farts, must emanate from living creatures, although some of the dead...