Evolutionary Theory of Farts

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Off the Farting Evolution Topic

But still somewhat related, passing gas seems to pass topical boundaries: Farting in Cheeks Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

States of Farts

Defective farts are those that lead to accidents. Those are disconcerting and numerous. People sometimes try too hard and they go beyond the gas to the liquid and to the solid. Witness this evidence: A Fart Too Far Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Rare Find

In my dirty sock drawer, I found the remnants of one of my earliest farts. It was hidden in one of the socks and had lost about half its potency, but, still, it was a megaton fart fossil. Let this serve as a warning to those of you who tend to explore old drawers, boxes, nooks and crannies. If you... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Secret Fartual Meaning

My research has lead me to a few astounding things, factoidals as one may incorrectly call them: (1) In the sea shanty, "Blow the Man Down" they are referring to sailors farting in port. This was as a result of drinking much beer and eating much of whatever took the place of pizza in them thear... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

It's a Gas

Sometimes benign and sometimes deadly. Chemical analysis of the fart fossils indicate that once they were deadly, now they are more annoying than dangerous. Of course, there are exceptions. My findings indicate that the chemical make-up of farts is closely related to climactic changes; the colder... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Wow! A new hypothesis on Fart Evolution

There seems to be some evidence that farts actually started evolving on planets in distant galaxies. It appears they may be instrumental, as well, in the instigation of super novas. I will continue to explore this aspect of fart evolution, although the data is very difficult to sniff out. Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Gas Giants?

More research is needed. I was watching a show called UNIVERSE on the Science Channel the other night and they spoke of Gas Giants throughout the universe. Are these giant stars made of fart gas? How did they originate. How will they dissipate? Will they dissipate? Will they stink up the universe?... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Vegetable Farts

I believe that the evidence shows that we became omnivorous because vegetable farts are downright gross and disgusting. Mother nature saw that we would wipe out all animal life if we continued eating just vegetables and plant life. The change to becoming meat eaters may have saved the earth. Don't... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Future Farts

Amazingly, the Fart Family Fern has led me to a theory that will allow me, in due time, to predict future farts, specifically their tenor, their chemical makeup and their DF (Technical Acronym: DF = Deadliness Factor). DF ranges from 8 - 12 today (on a logarithmic scale of 29), going up on... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Recent studies show some of the earliest farts were part of procreation

That's true. In the early times of our Earth, Amoeba developed, evolved farting as a trigger to their splittingmethod of reproduction. It is a tiny explosion of a fart that causes the final break away of the two parts of a reproducing amoeba. As an example of how that trait still hangs on through... Sign in to see full entry.

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