My life

Out of curiosity I looked up my old factory. One thing struck me, and that was how high my piece ranked on google! I wonder if anyone from the old days looked at it? More alarming was the fact that a little video I made of the old site came up as the only video link. Still, I don’t see or hear from anyone from those days, nor do I want to, as we all fell out badly. With me walking out. But it all fits in with my idea of re-creating old memories. If you suffered from altzimers or wanted to travel... Sign in to see full entry.

Sometimes on F-book I look up people I once knew. I don’t keep any contacts with friends or family, as I don’t want them pocking their noses into my affairs. But I can’t help wondering what they are all doing. I found an old ex-girlfriend of mine that married someone who used to drink in our local pub, and wondered what they were all doing now. The truth is-NOT MUCH. However, I am obsessed with revisiting the past, and trying to piece it together in the way I want it to be, and not the way it... Sign in to see full entry.

I have not made any entries of late, because I’ve gone down with a head cold. It might be the virus that’s going round, but I hope not, as I’ve had to flue jab and even I could not beat it. Anyway, I’ve not been in the mood, and have touched little of anything that matters. Of course I had to still go to work, but I got through it. I haven’t done anything towards the lottery, as I know you must not dabble in the black arts, if you are under the weather. For one, it just comes out as rubbish, but... Sign in to see full entry.

9,11,39, 42 and 46 If I had played these numbers with my usual ones, I would have landed 5 numbers on the HK lottery. For a stake of one penny a line (about £1.5 total) I could have landed £1,500. I’m sure I don’t have to stress how worrying this is. But If I had kept my nerve I would have cracked it. Like many, I hesitate when it comes to putting one a large spread, over so many lotteries. Better to find them in a steady but modest spread? Maybe. But it really grates when I see a big miss like... Sign in to see full entry.

I wanted to write at least something for Christmas day. Work has been so intense that I have not felt like writing anything. Pity really as it’s my only real therapy, and even though it sounds self-indulgent and morbid, I feel that getting my feelings down is the only way I can come to terms with anything. I’ve tried not to beat myself up for not winning even a small amount, as late, but my heart has not been in it, so maybe it’s for the best. I’ve been watching a lot of self-help stuff about... Sign in to see full entry.

After watching Dennis Potters’: the Singing Detective, it’s given me a hunger for writing again. Not just filling in the pages of a blog like this, but to get the imagination going. His story was partly about reopening the wounds of his childhood, and trying to work out why his present life was so mixed up. The other part was about the human imagination and how our flights of fancy can lift us to new heights. For many writers this is the only way of escaping a boring drudge of existence. You are... Sign in to see full entry.

Well, 2 weeks to go for Christmas, and the clock is ticking down. Nothing much going on, but that doesn’t make a very interesting entry if I just moan on. The lottery dowsing isn’t going too well. If I held my nerve I could have landed 3 several times. But of course I didn’t. But the system of dowsing works well enough, I just can’t find the perfect time to do it. It seems I work better under pressure than anything else. If I’m really relaxed and happy on my day off, the spirit doesn’t seem to... Sign in to see full entry.

One idea I’ve just had for a science fiction story would be the invention of a machine to get the lottery numbers. But to put some spin on it, why not make the lottery company savvy to the whole thing? After all, don’t you sometimes think that the big companies have a way of stopping you from winning? What if they had a machine that could predict all the wins and could go through time making sure no one really won the big prizes? I think casinos already do this. I do know that they employ... Sign in to see full entry.

Not much to say, only for the fact that I want to keep writing, even if it’s at the expense of just hearing my own voice. On holiday this week, so too much time and too many aspirations to fit into just a few days. I’ve toyed with the likes of Facebook and Twitter of late, but there is nowhere near the community of writers and thinkers that we have here. I can understand why some have left, as there are richer pickings to be had elsewhere. But you have to pour a lot of money into those things,... Sign in to see full entry.

I’ve been toying with the idea that I might re-write one of my old novels (Lottery Dreams) and re-tell it in a new light. One idea was to put a little more supernatural in it. Have the characters stumble on a Magic way of getting the money. It would still be set in the factory, and would still be a moralistic tale about modern capitalism and the end of the working class in England. I’ve wanted to narrate the story on YouTube for years, but something has always held me back. Maybe because I’ve... Sign in to see full entry.