Anything Goes

By gavelkorbald - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Misc. Funny Quotes From Resturants

"Is there chicken in your vegetarian gumbo?" -- Asked of a waitress. "Just the chicken." -- The response a waitress gave when asked if there were any dairy products in a soup. "Would you like cream and sugar with that?" -- Asked by a waitress when a customer specified orange juice instead of coffee... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, September 17, 2007

Driver Excuses

Here are a few excuses drivers used after being in an accident.... "A pedestrian hit me and went under my car." "The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention." "I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned the wheel to what I thought was enough and found... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Church Bulletins...

The following are the announcements that actually appeared in various church bulletins around the world. If you think deeply you will see the humor. Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help. Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow. There are some questions that can't... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Things you should not say....

Things You Should Not Say To A Security Guard When Caught Stealing Coins From A Mall Fountain 1. "Isn't there a robbery at the Orange Julius you should be investigating?" 2. I'm searching for a hard to find 1998 nickel." 3. "DUH!! The Gap is having a sale!" 4. "Did you know that it now costs 35... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

An incomplete list of Murphy's Laws of combat operations;

An incomplete list of Murphy's Laws of combat operations; Note: The original authors are unknown 1. Military Intelligence can be a contradiction in terms. 2. Recoilles rifles -- aren't 3. A sucking chest wound is nature's way of telling you to slow down. 4. The enemy diversion you are ignoreing is... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, September 7, 2007

Why Parents Drink.....

Why Parents Drink!;) A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Dad." With the worst premonition he opened the envelope with trembling... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Good Answer...

Florida's got it right. Bravo for Sheriff Judd!!! As reported earlier this week, some dirtbag who got pulled over in a routine traffic stop in Florida ended up "executing" the deputy who stopped him. The deputy was shot eight times, including once behind his right ear at close range. Another deputy... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, September 3, 2007

Down the Banister of Life

As You Slide Down the Banister of Life,Remember 1. Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written An impressive new book. It's called.......... "Ministers Do More Than Lay People." 2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink And be Mary. 3. The difference between the Pope and Your boss: the Pope only... Sign in to see full entry.

A.A.A.D.D.

OMG I CAN SOOOOOOOOOO RELATE TO THIS Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder. This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Airplane repair...

After every flight, UPS pilots fill out a form, called a "gripe sheet," which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground... Sign in to see full entry.

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