Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Saturday, April 13, 2013

old clyde

One day in the great state of Alabama a man walks outside and hears this strange noise coming from one of his trees. He proceeds to walk over to his tree and looks up in the tree to find the source of this noise. What he finds is a large gorilla moving around in the top of his tree trying to get... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, April 12, 2013

3 dead men

Three dead bodies turn up at the mortuary, all with very big smiles on their faces. The coroner calls the police to tell them what has happened. "First body: Frenchman, 60, died of heart failure while making love to his mistress. Hence the enormous smile, Inspector", says the Coroner. "Second body:... Sign in to see full entry.

Church for a redneck

karl was telling his buddies back on the farm about his first visit to a big city church. "When I got there, they made me park my old pick-up in the corral," he began. "You mean in the parking lot," interrupted Jeb, a more worldly fellow. "Then I walked up the trail to the door," karl continued.... Sign in to see full entry.

Matzo

A Jewish family invited their redneck neighbors over for holiday dinner. The first course was set in front of them and their hostess announced, "This is soup made with matzo balls." Seeing two large matzo balls in the soup, the redneck man was very hesitant to taste this strange looking brew. The... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Payback time

A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, "Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for weeks now." He looks at her and says angrily, "Fix the light? Now? Does it look like I have a G.E. logo printed on my forehead? I don't think so." "Well... Sign in to see full entry.

Martha's Redneck Tips

I saw this one and just had to share it with you.... 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. 3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church. 4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. 5. Even if you're... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Keys in the Car

How many of you have locked your keys in the car at one time or another? I have done on more than one occasion...This occasion was special...It was what they call a dee dee moment... I was on my way to a sorority reunion in Kansas City. I stopped in Springfield to pick up my date. Boy oh boy that... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

You are healed

An Irishman in a wheelchair rolls into a bar and asks the waitress for a cup of coffee. He then looks over at the bar and asks the waitress, "Is that Jesus?" The waitress says that it is, so the Irishman says, "Give him a cup of coffee... I'll pay." A few minutes later, an Englishman with a humped... Sign in to see full entry.

Duck Hunting

A guy was duck hunting in Alabama when the park ranger walks up, "Afternoon sir", the ranger says, "You got an Alabama duck hunting license"? "Yes I do", the redneck replies. The ranger picks up one of the ducks and sticks a finger up it's bum and takes a lick of his finger then says, "Sorry but... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Privates no more

Two boys from the mountains, Leroy and Jasper have been promoted from privates to sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Leroy says, "Hey Jasper, there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in." "But we's privates," protests Jasper. "We's sergeants now, "says Leroy, pulling him... Sign in to see full entry.