Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Kids say the silliest things! V

Q: What is a polygon? A: A dead parrot! Q: What flies through the jungle singing opera? A: The parrots of Penzance! Q: What do you get if you cross a duck with a firework? A: A firequaker! Q: What is a parrot's favorite game? A: Hide and Speak! Q: Why did the parrot wear a raincoat? A: Because she... Sign in to see full entry.

Which is your profession?

What does your profession say about you? 1. MARKETING - You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking and socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales. 2. SALES... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Kids say the silliest things! IV

Q: Who is the bees favorite singer? A: Sting! Q: Who is the bees favorite pop group? A: The bee gees! Q: What do you get if you cross a bee with a skunk? A: An animal that stinks and stings! Q: What does a queen bee do when she burps? A: Issues a royal pardon! Q: How does a queen bee get around her... Sign in to see full entry.

Career endings

How careers end... Lawyers are disbarred. Ministers are defrocked. Electricians are delighted. Far Eastern diplomats are disoriented. Drunks are distilled. Alpine climbers are dismounted. Piano tuners are unstrung. Orchestra leaders are disbanded. Artists' models are deposed. Cooks are deranged.... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, September 16, 2013

Kids say the silliest things! III

Q: What kind of money to polo bears use? A: Ice lolly! Q: Have you ever hunted bear? A: No, but I've been shooting in my shorts! Q: How do you start a teddy bear race? A: Ready, teddy, go! Q: What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp? A: A bear faced lyre! Q: Why do bears have fur... Sign in to see full entry.

Makes you wonder how they got to be in their position!

Here are some of the submissions of actual comments, notices, and statements coming out of different companies: As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, September 15, 2013

Kids say the silliest things! II

Where do ants go for their holidays? Frants! What do you call an ant who skips school? A truant! What do you get if you cross some ants with some tics? All sorts of antics! What do you call a greedy ant? An anteater! Why did the elephant put his trunk across the path? To trip up the ants! What is... Sign in to see full entry.

Smart salesman

Airman Jones was assigned to the induction center where he was to advise new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance. It wasn't long before Captain Smith noticed that Airman Jones had almost a 100% record for insurance sales, which had never happened before. Rather... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, September 14, 2013

Kids say the silliest things!

What are prehistoric monsters called when they sleep? A dinosnore! What is the fruitiest lesson? History, because it's full of dates! What language do they speak in Cuba? Cubic! Why did the stupid racing driver make ten pitstops during the race? He was asking for directions! How do you keep an... Sign in to see full entry.

Engineer Linguistics

Top 25 Engineer's Terms and Expressions (What they say versus what they mean) A number of different approaches are being tried. (We are still guessing at this point.) Close project coordination. (We sat down and had coffee together.) An extensive report is being prepared on a fresh approach. (We... Sign in to see full entry.