Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

pictures

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, "There's Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or “That’s Michael, he's a doctor.'" A small voice at the... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, May 19, 2014

blondes everywhere

During a recent password audit by a company, it was found that an employee was using the following password: "MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento" When asked why she had such a long password, she rolled her eyes and said: "Hello! It has to be at least 8 characters long and include... Sign in to see full entry.

teacher

Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating? Sam: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook. Sign in to see full entry.

i need a raise

The boss had listened in sympathetic silence as Mario went through the reasons why he needed, and felt he deserved, a raise. Then, with a compassionate smile, the CEO patted the younger man on the shoulder. “Yes, Mario,” he said kindly, “I know you can’t get married on the salary I’m paying you… and... Sign in to see full entry.

how to pass the time away in an elevator

Fun Things To Do In An Elevator: 1. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" 2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!" 3. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, May 18, 2014

why boss why?

One CEO always scheduled staff meetings for 4:30 on Friday afternoons. One of the employees finally got up the nerve to ask why, the CEO explained, “I’ll tell you its very simple – it’s the only time of the week when none of you seems to want to argue with me.” Sign in to see full entry.

in your face!

General Amalgamated Industries, feeling it was time for a shakeup, hired a new CEO. The new boss was determined to rid the company of all slackers. On a tour of the facilities, the CEO noticed a guy leaning against a wall. The room was full of workers and he wanted to let them know that he meant... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

the news

A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, "Read all about it; Fifty people swindled!” Fifty people swindled! Curios, a man walked over, bought a paper, and said, "Hey kid, this is an old paper, where’s the story about the big swindle?” The newsboy ignored him and went on... Sign in to see full entry.

tourists!

Three visitors to London climb up the tower that houses Big Ben and decide to have a contest. They're going to throw their watches off the top, run down the stairs and try to catch the watches before they hit the ground. The first tourist throws his watch, takes three steps and hears his watch... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, May 16, 2014

hey! at least he is honest!

A man is being interviewed for a job. “What are your qualifications for the job of night watchman?” “The slightest noise wakes me up.” Sign in to see full entry.