Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Saturday, August 30, 2014

drunk

The drunken defendant appears yet again before the tired judge, who says, "You have been constantly appearing before me for the past twenty years." Replied the drunk: "Can I help it if you can't get promoted?" Sign in to see full entry.

plumber

A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor!." The plumber quietly answered,... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

3 wishes

There were 3 friends stranded in an island. Exploring the island, the 3 men found a bottle so they opened it. A genie came out, and she said that she would grant them 3 wishes. The first man said, "I wish I was with my family" then poof he was with his family. The second guy said "I wish I was in a... Sign in to see full entry.

pickpocket

A pick pocket was pronounced guilty and sentenced to 8 months jail term with an option of $200 fine by the judge. His defense lawyer knowing that his client could not pay the fine, pleaded with the judge asking; “Your honor, my client can only afford $50, but if you allow him a few minutes in the... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

genie

A man and an ostrich walk into a restaurant. The waitress asks, "What will it be?" The man replied "a burger and a coke." "And you?" "I'll have the same," the ostrich replies. They finish their meal and pay. "That will be $4.50," The man reached into his pocket and pulled out the exact amount. They... Sign in to see full entry.

what day is today?

Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is." "Of course I do," he indignantly answered, going out the door on his way the office. At 10 AM, the doorbell rang, and when the woman opens the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long-stemmed... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

genie

A guy was in a cave, looking for treasure. He found an old lamp, rubbed it, and a genie came out. The genie said "I will grant you three wishes, but your ex-wife will get double." The man agreed, and said "I wish I had a mansion." The genie granted it, and his ex-wife got two mansions. The man said... Sign in to see full entry.

testing

“How are you getting on with your exams?” “Not bad. The questions are easy enough – it’s the answers I have trouble with!” Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

golfing

Hawk and Tom were talking in the bar. Hawk said," I just got kicked off the course for breaking 60." Tom looked at him, amazed. " Breaking 60? That's amazing!" Hawk smiled and said," Yeah, I never knew a golf cart could go that fast!" Sign in to see full entry.

in the park

Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he new the other two.... Sign in to see full entry.

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