drunk
The drunken defendant appears yet again before the tired judge, who says, "You have been constantly appearing before me for the past twenty years." Replied the drunk: "Can I help it if you can't get promoted?" Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, August 30, 2014
plumber
A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while, and handed the doctor a bill for $600. The doctor exclaimed, "This is ridiculous! I don't even make that much as a doctor!." The plumber quietly answered,... Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, August 28, 2014
3 wishes
There were 3 friends stranded in an island. Exploring the island, the 3 men found a bottle so they opened it. A genie came out, and she said that she would grant them 3 wishes. The first man said, "I wish I was with my family" then poof he was with his family. The second guy said "I wish I was in a... Sign in to see full entry.
pickpocket
A pick pocket was pronounced guilty and sentenced to 8 months jail term with an option of $200 fine by the judge. His defense lawyer knowing that his client could not pay the fine, pleaded with the judge asking; “Your honor, my client can only afford $50, but if you allow him a few minutes in the... Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, August 27, 2014
genie
A man and an ostrich walk into a restaurant. The waitress asks, "What will it be?" The man replied "a burger and a coke." "And you?" "I'll have the same," the ostrich replies. They finish their meal and pay. "That will be $4.50," The man reached into his pocket and pulled out the exact amount. They... Sign in to see full entry.
what day is today?
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is." "Of course I do," he indignantly answered, going out the door on his way the office. At 10 AM, the doorbell rang, and when the woman opens the door, she was handed a box containing a dozen long-stemmed... Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
genie
A guy was in a cave, looking for treasure. He found an old lamp, rubbed it, and a genie came out. The genie said "I will grant you three wishes, but your ex-wife will get double." The man agreed, and said "I wish I had a mansion." The genie granted it, and his ex-wife got two mansions. The man said... Sign in to see full entry.
testing
“How are you getting on with your exams?” “Not bad. The questions are easy enough – it’s the answers I have trouble with!” Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, August 24, 2014
golfing
Hawk and Tom were talking in the bar. Hawk said," I just got kicked off the course for breaking 60." Tom looked at him, amazed. " Breaking 60? That's amazing!" Hawk smiled and said," Yeah, I never knew a golf cart could go that fast!" Sign in to see full entry.
in the park
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch. A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he new the other two.... Sign in to see full entry.