Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

captured by cannibals

Cannibals capture three men. The men are told that they will be skinned and eaten and then their skin will be used to make canoes. Then they are each given a final request. The first man asks to be killed as quickly and painlessly as possible. His request is granted, and they poison him. The second... Sign in to see full entry.

trophy wife

Bob, a 70-year-old, extremely wealthy widower, shows up at the Country Club with a breathtakingly beautiful and very sexy 25-year-old blonde-haired woman who knocks everyone's socks off with her youthful sex appeal and charm and who hangs over Bob's arm and listens intently to his every word. His... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 24, 2014

one upmouseship

Three mice are sitting around drinking and boasting about their strengths. The first mouse says "Mouse traps, Ha! I do pushups with the bar". The second mouse pulls a pill from his pocket, swallows it, and says with a grin "D-Con Rat Poison". The third mouse finishes his drink, slams his glass on... Sign in to see full entry.

well that's just ducky

A duck walked into a bakery one day and asked for a pork chop. The baker said, "We aren't a butcher; we don't sell meat here." So the duck left. The following day the duck went back and asked again. This time the Baker said, "No, if you come here again I will nail your feet to the floor." The... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, November 23, 2014

listen!

A Texas rancher was driving through Mexico and stopped at the edge of the road to admire the scenery and a white beautiful horse caught his eye. The horse looked healthy well kept and was in a separate corral. Just for tries the Texan asked one of the workers if the horse was for sale. The worker... Sign in to see full entry.

cats rule

Cat Lover's Rules: 1. The cat is not allowed in the house. 2. OK, the cat is allowed in the house, but only in certain rooms. 3. Ok, the cat is allowed in all rooms, but must stay off the furniture. 4. The cat can get on the old furniture only. 5. Fine, the cat is allowed on all the furniture, but... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 22, 2014

thanksgiving humor II

What did the Turkey say before it was roasted? Boy, I'm stuffed! Sign in to see full entry.

thanksgiving humor

What happened when the turkey got into a fight? He got the stuffing knocked out of him! Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 21, 2014

not so charming!

Once upon a time, a beautiful, independent, self-assured princess happened upon a frog in a pond. The frog said to the princess, " I once was a handsome prince until an evil witch put a spell on me. One kiss from you and I will turn back into a prince and then we can marry, move into the castle with... Sign in to see full entry.

no you didn't!

"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then, why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor... Sign in to see full entry.