What Happened When The CityBoy Moved to TheCountry

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Do You Have This in Medium??

Unfortunately, after rummaging in vain through the racks of boxers three times, I couldn't find a pair of Breathalizer underwear in my size. In my hand, I held two hangers--one clenching a large pair, and the other clasping a small pair. As any respectable homosexual male knows, it is not... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 18, 2005

What a Delicious Shock It Would Be

I was in Myrtle Beach when I stumbled upon the Big Dogs outlet store at Barefoot Landing. Just like all the previous times I spotted one of these stores during my travels, I found myself drawn through its inviting doors, lured by huge red signs that promised 50% off of t-shirts. Once inside, I found... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 14, 2005

Spinning Around

One of the most handsome men I've ever seen in my life had just entered the laundry room (he was even more handsome than mikebrown), and he also had two baskets of clothing. Evidently, he--clad in a tank top and a pair of sweatpants--was on his way to work out and had decided to throw in a couple of... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, November 9, 2005

The Importance of Underwear

It could happen. My friends would probably laugh at my insinuation that somewhere, somehow, I might have a torrid sexual encounter during which my pants would tumble to the ground, leaving me standing with bare legs and my underwear exposed. Who knows what the future holds. Though I have to admit,... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 5, 2005

Having Conversations with Evil Appliances

The Monster's brother told me it had something to do with not having lateral lines (whatever those things are). That is the reason why my kitchen, a reject from Bedrock, will never harbor a dishwasher. Though I consider backward inconveniences as these better left to the Desperate Housewives of... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, November 3, 2005

Everyone's Got Their Something

Everybody has that one special piece of furniture in their home which they treasure. Maybe it's a cabinet that was bequeathed to them by a parent. Maybe it's an old couch that, despite its age and appearance, offers up the most incredible lounging known to man. It might be something as simple as an... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Life Lines (featuring mikebrown)

To my surprise, the audience roars with applause and I hear an excited few bloggers giggling in amusement. Reluctantly, I switch places with The Monster, taking his space upon the couch. "You do realize this is my daydream," I say dryly. To which, he responds, "I guess this is what's called Having... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Is That Your Final Answer (featuring mikebrown)

The search for names has begun in my household. Though I would like to believe the number of mouths to feed at my little gay canine country resort has only grown by one, I am pretty sure when it comes time to auction off the unwanted pups to the most loving bidders, The Monster and I will decide to... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

Colonel Sanders and The Nest of Mothra

Days turned to weeks, and weeks turned to months. The pile of branches and burnable waste beneath the Sugar Maple had tripled in size, mutating into something that looked like a giant nest. I kept asking The Monster when he planned to burn the pile, and he came up with 101 excuses why the time... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

I Don't Make Trash; I Burn It

The last time Becky had brought Timmy to visit my home, the little boy had observed that my kitchen smelled like a fart (see July 26). During their visit this past weekend, my nephew surveyed my back yard and pointed at a large charred area in the grass. "Uncle Joe's grass is turning bald." Despite... Sign in to see full entry.

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