Trouble With Initials

Once upon a time the government had a vast scrap yard in the middle of a desert. Congress said "someone may steal from it at night." So they created a night watchman position and hired a person for the job. Then Congress said, "How does the watchman do his job without instruction?" So they created a... Sign in to see full entry.

Some of the All Time Dumbest Questions Asked by Banff Park, Alberta, Tourists On nature... How do the elk know they're supposed to cross at the "Elk Crossing" signs? At what elevation does an elk become a moose? Tourist: "How do you pronounce 'Elk'?" Park Information Staff: " 'Elk' " Tourist: "Oh"... Sign in to see full entry.

An elderly man inquired of his wife about a recent, large expense. "Well yes I bought this new hearing aid, dear." his wife replied. "How much did it cost, dear?," he asked. "Four thousand dollars," she said. "Four thousand dollars! Why would you have to pay so much for a hearing aid?", he... Sign in to see full entry.

A young man who was also an avid golfer found himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he hurried and played very fast, he could get in 9 holes before he had to head home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto the tee and asked if he could accompany the... Sign in to see full entry.

Before you leave for vacation, make sure you have plenty of "lemon aid" for your car, if any of the below are happening: 1. As you leave the used car lot, you see the owner rush out with a gigantic smile and high-five the salesman. 2. You notice that the car phone they threw in "for free" has a... Sign in to see full entry.

A man was driving along a rural road one day when he saw a three legged chicken. He was amused enough to drive along side it for a while, as he was driving he noticed the chicken was running 30 mph. Pretty fast chicken, he thought, I wonder just how fast it can run. So he sped up and the chicken did... Sign in to see full entry.

It was the day of the big sale. Rumors (no relation) of the sale and an advertisement in the local paper were the main reasons for the long line that formed in front of the store by 8:30, the store's opening time. A small man pushed his way to the front of the line, only to be pushed back amid loud... Sign in to see full entry.

Tips On Love From Those That Should Know* (all questions were answered by kids, age 5-10) *What is the proper to get married? "Eighty-four, Because at that age, you don't have to work anymore, and you can spend all your time loving each other in your bedroom." (Judy,8) "Once I'm done with... Sign in to see full entry.

At the data-entry company where she works, the other operators share a coffeepot with her. One morning she took it into the ladies room to fill it with water. Then she began preening in the mirror, brushing her hair and reapplying some makeup. She didn't realize how long she'd been until someone... Sign in to see full entry.

(blame it on liability insurance costs) On directions for an auto part - "Before installing, be sure to shut off the engine" The label on a toy witches broom: "This broom does not actually fly" On a clothes iron: "Do not iron clothes on body" From a Christmas light package - "For indoor or outdoor... Sign in to see full entry.