Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Fooled You!

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher claimed that the bull must have been hit by the train, and wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case... Sign in to see full entry.

Cops following?

A blonde and a brunette are out driving, and the brunette tells the blonde to look out for cops - especially cops with their lights on. After they've been driving for a while, the brunette asks the blonde if she's seen any cops. "Yes," says the blonde. "Are their lights on?" The blonde has to think... Sign in to see full entry.

Blondes have more fun

Love you kabu! Q: Why are dumb blonde jokes so short? A: So brunettes can remember them. Q: What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? A: You pick it up pull the pin & throw it back. Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer? A: She slipped off and fell down the drain. Q: How can you tell... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 25, 2013

fooled you!

After being married for 27 years this guy tells his wife that he is bored and is going to the bar to have a drink. As he enters the bar this gorgeous blond call him over. She says instead of you staying down here and drinking why don't you come upstairs to my apartment and we can drink and have sex... Sign in to see full entry.

oh Doctor!

A man sees a woman joging down the street while throwing back her arms, pushing her chest out and repeating "I must, I must, increase my bust. Totally puzzled by this the man stops her. MAN: Why are you doing that. WOMAN: My doctor told me that doing this exercise and repeating I MUST, I MUST,... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

What star level have you reached?

1 star hangover * - No pain. No real feeling of illness. You slept in your own bed and when you woke up there were no traffic cones in there with you. You are still able to function relatively well on the energy stored up from all those vodka red bulls. However, you can drink 10 bottles of water and... Sign in to see full entry.

moral of the story

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying hens. One time we were taking our... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

CAUTION! Not pc and sex involved

A man entered a tattoo parlor and wanted to get a tattoo. "What can I do for you?" asked the tattoo artist. "Well," the man replied, "I want to get a $100 dollar bill tattooed on my penis." "I've never had that requested before. Do you mind if I ask why?" "Well, I really like to watch my money grow.... Sign in to see full entry.

OOOOps

WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?" HUSBAND: "Definitely not!" WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?" HUSBAND: "Of course I do." WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?" HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again." WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Poor Dog!

This guy has been dating a girl for 4 months now. She calls him up one day and tells him: "Paul you have to meet my parents. We have been going out for like 4 months". He agrees... The day he agrees to meet her family,he is having some MAJOR gas! The whole drive to her parents house he is letting... Sign in to see full entry.