Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, January 26, 2017

remodeling

A lady was complaining to her husband about remodeling her kitchen. "You have been telling me you were going to get me new cabinets for ten years!" said the wife. "They are a luxury and the ones we have are fine." the husband replied. The next day the wife goes to visit her mother for two weeks.... Sign in to see full entry.

jail break

A man escaped jail by digging a hole from his jail cell to the outside world. When finally his work was done, he emerged in the middle of a preschool playground. "I'm free, I'm free!" he shouted. "So what," said a little girl. "I'm four." Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, January 25, 2017

insulted

On this morning a woman and her baby were taking a bus. As she entered the bus the driver says "Wow that is one ugly baby." The woman deeply hurt just continued on the bus and found a seat next to an elderly man. The man asks "What's wrong you look mad?" She replied "I am. That bus driver just... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, January 24, 2017

longevity

This printed in a Texas newspaper: The oldest cowboy in Texas died this week at the age of 106. On his birthday he was asked his secret to longevity and he said that for the past 50 years he has sprinkled a little gunpowder on his cereal each morning. He left behind 8 children, 21 grandchildren, 32... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, January 23, 2017

wedding

A little boy was in a relative's wedding. As he was coming down the aisle he would take two steps, stop, and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side). While facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar. So it went, step, step, ROAR, step, step, ROAR... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Oh no!

Once upon a time, there lived a man who had a terrible passion for baked beans. He loved them, but they always had an embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction on him. One day he met a girl and fell in love. When it was apparent that they would marry, he thought to himself "She'll never go for me... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, January 21, 2017

mischievious

A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten, who were excessively mischievous. The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit's end as... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, January 20, 2017

cold water

A man went to visit his 90 year old grandfather in a secluded, rural area of the state. After spending the night, his grandfather prepared breakfast for him consisting of eggs and bacon. He noticed a film-like substance on his plate and he questioned his grandfather....are these plates clean? His... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, January 19, 2017

puppies

A three-year-old boy went with his dad to see a litter of puppies. On returning home, he breathlessly informed his mother, "There were 2 boy puppies and 2 girl puppies." "How did you know?" his mother asked. "Daddy picked them up and looked underneath." He replied. "I think it's printed on the... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, January 18, 2017

tests

In class one day, Mr. Johnson pulled Johnny over to his desk after a test, and said, Johnny I have a feeling that you have been cheating on your tests. Johnny was astounded and asked Mr. Johnson to prove it. Well, said Mr. Johnson, I was looking over your test and the question was, Who was our... Sign in to see full entry.