Guy's blog about life with pets in northern mich.

A man called his friend, a doctor, and asked if he knew of a medical condition that made what looked like a green dye stain, shaped like a “W” because he noticed one low on his chest that morning. After some thought, his friend asked if the guy and his girlfriend ever make love while partially dressed. The answer was, “Yes, often.” The doc told him, “I’ll bet your girlfriend attends Wisconsin U, doesn’t she?” “No.” the worried man replied, “She goes to Michigan State!” When a caveman knocked out... Sign in to see full entry.

Baby knows his position on the pack totem pole is third from the top, being as he is the “Beta Male.” It’s funny to watch him claim the best spot to sit when Marilyn or I vacate one of the two “best spots.” If I return, he leaves immediately because he knows that I will sit on him if he doesn’t. He must be part Ferengi (there is a resemblance) because if he has claimed Marilyn’s spot and she returns, he ignores her approach. She is short tempered (an inch or less) and tells him to MOVE! He... Sign in to see full entry.

What part of the chicken is the “nuggets?” I hope it’s not what I think! I’d rather eat their beaks. I know that I’m not even tempted to taste bull nuggets. Shudder, I don’t want to think about that! As Homer Simpson said, while aboard a navy ship, “What is the ‘poop deck’ for? I hope it isn’t what I think!” Spring appears to have finally arove in Michigan! There were a few days this winter that I was glad I'm not a brass monkey. Delivering meals, I was as cold as a frog down a well. Now the... Sign in to see full entry.

A little boy was relaxing comfortably one warm saturday, when a passerby stopped to talk with him. The adult told the boy, "Son, I've got a quarter for you if you can direct me to the train station." The boy didn't move a bit and said nothing, but moved his eyes to the left a couple times. Sure enough, there was the station down the street a block away. As he paid the boy the stranger said to him that many would think the boy was lazy but the grownup was a professional "efficiency expert" and... Sign in to see full entry.

A sweet little old white-haired lady was waiting for a bus when a little boy walked past leading his dog on a piece of rope. She said, “You have a very nice looking dog, son. What do you call him?” He replied, “His name is Porky.” She smiled and asked, “Did you name him Porky because he is so chubby?” The boy answered, “No Ma’am, we named him Porky because he is always humping our pigs!” Two little old ladies, waiting for a bus saw, a young boy sitting on a curb in front of a foul smelling... Sign in to see full entry.

Not all annoying animals live outside! Our friendly neighborhood opossum has decided that his impersonation of being a cat was successful, apparently. He (?) shows up nightly to see if the cats have left him any food and no longer hightails it (not the best choice of words) when we open the door. He or she must be generously spreading the word to ‘possum friends and family about the food we put out for them. I can surmise this because there are now several different sizes of ‘possum who look up... Sign in to see full entry.

I do wonder if blogit.com will automatically receive my new email address, or if it will be necessary for me to inform them, personally. I hope that this resets without any input from me. Now that i am not limited to 495 minutes per month (!) I can read and read other blogs until my eyes cross! What a treat this will be. In this area, (rural) and with our phone company, I still cannot receive DSL service but am told that this will occur eventually. Later, Guy Sign in to see full entry.

My youngest brother, the one that wears a turban and studies and teaches yoga, bought a striking, white stretch limo last year. He did this because he had the chance to and he has unusual tastes and sense of humor. This must be a family trait. Anyway, he drives his limo as you and I do, our personal car. The passenger compartment has dark tinted windows that were originally intended to assure privacy for paying customers, when it was a business vehicle and not a private “land yacht.” My brother... Sign in to see full entry.

There is a commercial airing now that is so funny, that I might have written it. People are sitting in a diner, talking about colon cancer screening. You have to suspend disbelief that this is a likely topic of conversation. The man is telling two women that he underwent the screening process, himself. He then explained and illustrated how and why, using a trough he swept in his mashed potatoes to represent his colon, and a lima bean to represent a colon polyp. He said that if a polyp were... Sign in to see full entry.

Whoever designed our computer keyboards should have spent more time thinking about it. He or she put the “caps-lock” key right next to the “shift” key. INSANITY! If you aren’t watching the screen while typing, you have to go back and fix dozens of screwed up letters because you didn’t notice that the other key got bumped along with the “shift” key. The other “shift” key is small and the adjoining “enter” key is large. Which do you use more? The “QWERTY” keyboard was designed to keep the old... Sign in to see full entry.