What do Santa's female reindeer do on Christmas Eve while the male reindeer pull his sleigh? Oh, not much... They just head into town to blow a few bucks. Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Last 10 things
THE LAST 10 THINGS A MAN WOULD EVER SAY 10- I think Barry Manilow is one cool mother-fucker! 9- While I'm up, can I get you a beer? 8- I'm absolutely wrong, you must be right! 7- Her tits are just way too big. 6- Sometimes, I just want to be held. 5- That chick on "Murder, She Wrote" gives me a... Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
elderly lady
There was a man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged 6 miles a day. One day, he took a look in the mirror and noticed that he was tan all over except his 'thing.' So, he decided to do something about it. He went to the beach, completely undressed himself and buried in the... Sign in to see full entry.
Sayings on Women's Ts
Don't piss me off! I'm running out of places to hide the bodies. Guys have feelings too. But like... who cares? I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them. Next mood swing: 6 minutes. I hate everybody, and you're next. Please don't make me kill you. And your point is... I used to be schizophrenic,... Sign in to see full entry.
better than an egg
If you think life is bad... How would you like to be an egg? You only get laid once.You only get eaten once. It takes 4 minutes to get hard. Only 2 minutes to get soft. You share your box with 11 other guys. But worst of all... The only chick that ever sat on your face was your mother. So cheer... Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, May 12, 2013
3 defs of good date
These three women were roommates. One night they all had all gone out on dates and all came home at about the same time. The first one said, "You know you've been on a good date when you come home with your hair all messed up." The second one said, "No, you know you've been on a good date when you... Sign in to see full entry.
I am woman!
I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am I don't live off of Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam I don't brag to my buddies about my erections I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions I don't get wasted at parties and act like a clown And I know how to put the damned toilet seat down! I won't... Sign in to see full entry.
No more beans for me!
Once upon a time there lived a woman who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them but unfortunately they had always had a very embarrassing and somewhat lively reaction to her. Then one day she met a guy and fell in love. When it became apparent that they would marry she thought to... Sign in to see full entry.
new fairy tale
Once upon a time a beautiful independent self assured princess happened upon a frog in a pond. The frog said to the princess "I was once a handsome prince until an evil witch put a spell on me. One kiss from you and I will turn back into a prince and then we can marry, move into the castle with mum,... Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, May 10, 2013
Awww honey
Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back, He says,"Honey, my hands are freezing!" She says,"Well, put them here between my thighs and that will warm them up." After lunch he goes back out to... Sign in to see full entry.