(Mostly) Humorous Quotes

Friday, July 1, 2005

Twice a month?

My wife cut me down to twice a month. But that's not so bad. I know two other guys she's cut out altogehter--Rodney Dangerfield. Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 2:20 PM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Between a man and a woman

Sex between a man and a woman can be wonderful as long as you get between the right man and woman.--Woody Allen Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 11:54 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Happy Childhood

It's never too late to have a happy childhood. Tom Robbins Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 4:55 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Humble

When you're as great as I am, it's hard to be humble--Muhammad Ali Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 2:30 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Can't Stop 'em

If people don't want to come to the ballpark, nobody's going to stop them. Yogi Berra Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 2:32 PM | add or view comments (1) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Reading the Tabloids

People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to. Jerry Seinfeld Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 3:14 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Monday, May 2, 2005

Two wrongs

Two wrongs don't make a right. You need at least three. Mae West Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 2:39 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, May 1, 2005

Do the right thing

Americans will always do the right thing--after they've exhausted all other alternatives. Winston Churchhill Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 1:29 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Rich or Poor

I've been rich and I've been poor. Rich is better. Sophie Tucker Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 2:45 PM | add or view comments (1) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, April 24, 2005

How cynical?

No matter how cynical you get, it's impossible to keep up.--Lily Tomlin Sign in to see full entry.

posted by jollyjeff at 12:12 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry