The State Bore of Texas for Saturday, August 27, 2005

‘SISSY SPORT’ FIXTURES BECOME LATEST SAME-SEXERS TO MARRY Houston (State Bore News) – In a moving, intimate ceremony Saturday at The Montrose Mansion, stand-ins for Lance Armstrong and Bill Dance exchanged vows and shared a deeply-felt kiss in sealing their mock same-sex union officiated by Justice of the Peace Pete Hillary. "This one was especially moving," Judge Hillary told The Bore. "When these two fellas exchanged their yellow ‘Live Strong’ bracelets, embraced each other’s nude sculpted... Sign in to see full entry.

HUSBAND WAS ‘ASKING FOR IT’ ANGRY JUDGE TELLS D.A.’s Houston (State Bore News) – After five weeks of testimony, Harris County State District Judge Sara Anne Mas-Delmismo abruptly ended the penis severing case against Maria Sinel Pene. The judge declared a directed verdict in favor of the defendant after the State of Texas rested its case. The Judge then angrily admonished the State for, "Nit-picking a woman for expressing well-earned disgust." The Judge called the case, "A domestic spat unfit... Sign in to see full entry.