Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, October 24, 2013

I had a blonde moment today...II

Years ago I was on my way to a reunion for my sorority in Kansas City. I was stopping in Springfield to pick up my date. I got there and we were unloading my station wagon (yes I actually drove a station wagon all those years ago when I had small children) and I accidentally locked the keys in the... Sign in to see full entry.

Gotcha!

A man walking along the beach one day finds a bottle. He rubs it and, sure enough, out popped a genie. "I will grant you three wishes," said the genie. "But there is a catch." "What catch?" the man asked. The genie replied, "Every time you make a wish, every lawyer in the world will receive double... Sign in to see full entry.

One mans ...

Oncer there was three men in an airplane. They were throwing things out of the plane that they had in adbundance in their countries. One threw an cabbage. Later another threw an orange and finally the last man stepped up and threw a grenade. A couple of minutes later they got off the plane and... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

I had a blonde moment today...

Today I was doing 3 mystery shops. I usually parked away from the business after I finish so I can write down as much info as I can before I go to the next one. Today I was hungry after my third one (maybe a little protein deprived hence the foggy brain ). I decided to stop at Golden Corral for... Sign in to see full entry.

Gotta Loves Those Blondes!

A blonde went to a flight school insisting that she wanted to learn to fly. As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to instruct her by radio on how to pilot the solo helicopter. He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the basics, and sent her on her way. After she... Sign in to see full entry.

Give it a second

I have a friend who is a pilot on a 747. I said "Hi Jack." He shot me. Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

How much do you weigh!

According to "The Australian," an airliner recently encountered severe vibration in flight. The captain decided to make an emergency landing, and switched on the seat belt sign. The vibration stopped immediately. A passenger emerged from a lavatory and explained that he had been jogging in place... Sign in to see full entry.

Oh Wifey!

"Cash, check or charge?" I asked after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I notice a remote control for a television set in her purse. "Do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. "No," she replied. "But my husband refused to come shopping with me, so I... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Truth in advertising

CLASSIFIED ERRORS, from a small-town daily: (Monday) FORE SALE - R. D. Jones has one sewing machine for sale. Phone 555-0707 after 7 p.m. and ask for Mrs. Kelly who lives with him cheap. (Tuesday) NOTICE - We regret having erred in R. D. Jone's ad yesterday. It should have read: One sewing machine... Sign in to see full entry.

What if advertisers told you what they really think

These are fabricated corporate slogans that would never have made if far if they entered the real world. Microsoft: "How much are you going to pay today?" MTV: "Loud and easy to spell." Saks 5th Avenue: "You Could Shop Here if You're Poor, But That Would be Stupid!" Iguana: "The other green meat."... Sign in to see full entry.