“Will you love me when I’m old and ugly?” “Darling, of course I do.” Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, February 1, 2015
Saturday, January 31, 2015
car wreck
A blonde was driving home on the freeway after work when she was hit by a hailstorm that left her car completely dented all over. She decided to go to a body shop and asked the owner how much he would charge to remove the dents. Seeing that she was an antartian, he winked at his partner, and told... Sign in to see full entry.
Why!
Timothy:Why are you catching so many fleas? Mike:Didn't you see the Notice Board? There's going to be a Flea Market at our Apartment Lobby tomorrow morning. Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, January 30, 2015
ask a dumb question
Teacher: If you had 20p in one trouser pocket and 60p in the other, what do you have? Pupil: Someone else’s trousers, miss. Sign in to see full entry.
you can fly!
At a construction site on the 80th floor of a high rise building, the lone conservative on the crew was having a heated political discussion with the liberals on the project. Deciding to take a break, he called everyone over to the edge of the roof. "Did you know," he began, "that there are... Sign in to see full entry.
Thursday, January 29, 2015
lil johnny on the loose again
Teacher: Johnny, can you tell me what the four seasons are? Lil Johnny: Salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar. Sign in to see full entry.
Adam and Eve
Adam and Eve had an ideal marriage. He didn’t have to hear about all the men she could have married, and she didn’t have to hear about the way his mother cooked. Sign in to see full entry.
Wednesday, January 28, 2015
lil johnny on the loose again
In chemistry class the subject was "oxidation - reduction.” The teacher was really excited and after the lesson asked the students in a very loud voice, “now tell me where is the electron? Where is it?" a drowsy lil johnny jumps up at this and shouts "o.k." Nobody moves. Sir, shut the door. We can... Sign in to see full entry.
Lil Susie
The teacher asks: Now, Susan, how may fingers have you? Susan: Ten. Teacher: Right. Now if you lost four of them, what would you have? Susan: No more piano lessons. Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, January 27, 2015
lil johnny on the loose again
“What would you like to be when you grow up Lil Johnny?” “I’d like to be a teacher, sir.” “Would you, indeed? And why would you like to be a teacher?” “Cause I wouldn’t have to do any more learning – I’d know everything by then!” Sign in to see full entry.