- EVER WONDER - - Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin? - - Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed? - - Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? - - Why is "abbreviated" such a long word? - - Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? - -... Sign in to see full entry.
Tuesday, December 16, 2014
Monday, December 15, 2014
polling
An elementary school teacher decides to pole the class on the difficulty of last night’s homework assignment: How many people were able to complete the assignment without parents help? About 25% of the class raises their hands. How many people we able to complete the assignment with the help of a... Sign in to see full entry.
lurning
“It’s no good, sir,” said the hopeless pupil to his English teacher, ‘I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears and out the other.” “Goes in both ears and out the other?” asked the puzzled teacher, “but you only have two ears, son.” “You see, sir,” I’m no good at math, either!” Sign in to see full entry.
Sunday, December 14, 2014
3 sisters
Three sisters age 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96 year old draws a bath, puts her foot in and pauses. She yells down the stairs, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know, I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs and pauses, then... Sign in to see full entry.
teacher!
“What did your mother do yesterday morning. Vicky?” “She done her shopping, ma’am.” “Done her shopping, Vicky? Where’s your grammar?” “She done her shopping as well, ma’am.” Sign in to see full entry.
job candidate
A candidate at a job interview was asked a tough question to which he mumbled an inaudible answer. The interviewer said "Come again?" The candidate got up, collected his file, went out of the room and came back again. Sign in to see full entry.
Saturday, December 13, 2014
lingerie
A couple was at the mall and his wife decided to buy something for their daughter-in-law at an exclusive lingerie shop. Inside, the husband was feeling very out of place when a beautiful clerk asked if she could help him. In a cocky manner, he asked, “Where are all the men’s clothes?” In a demure... Sign in to see full entry.
twist
If pro is the opposite of con, what's the opposite of progress? Congress! Sign in to see full entry.
Friday, December 12, 2014
sign
Sign in a Police Station: It takes about 3500 bolts to put a car together; but only one nut to scatter it all over the road. Sign in to see full entry.
dentist
A sign posted in a Dentist's office said: "Please be nice to our dentists. They have fillings too." Sign in to see full entry.