Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, November 17, 2016

quotes

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible. ~George Burns Santa Claus has the right idea... Visit people only once a year. ~Victor Borge What would men be without women? Scarce, sir.. mighty scarce. ~Mark Twain By all... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, November 16, 2016

new defs V

Seamstress seem'-stres: describes 200 pounds in a size two. Selfish sel'-fish: what the owner of a seafood store does. Subdued sub-dood': a guy, that works on one of those submarines. Sudafed sood'-a-fed: bringing litigation against a government official Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 14, 2016

new defs IV

Paradox par'-u-doks: two physicians. Parasites par'-uh-sites: what you see from the top of the Eiffel Tower. Pharmacist farm'-uh-sist: a helper on the farm. Polarize po'-lur-ize: what penguins in Antarctica see. Primate pri'-mat: removing your spouse from in front of the TV. Relief ree-leef': what... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 12, 2016

new defs III

Eclipse i-klips': what an English barber does for a living. Eyedropper i'-drop-ur: a clumsy ophthalmologist. Heroes hee'-rhos: what a guy in a boat does. Left Bank left' bangk': what the robber did when his bag was full of loot. Misty mis'-tee: How golfers create divots. Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 11, 2016

new defs II

If you are easily offended then please don't read this entry.... Trumped Woman being grabbed by her P****y by stranger without her consent Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, November 10, 2016

new defs

Arbitrator ar'-bi-tray-ter: A cook that leaves Arby's to work at McDonald's. Avoidable uh-voy'-duh-buhl: What a bullfighter tries to do. Baloney buh-lo'-nee: Where some hemlines fall. Bernadette burn'-a-det: The act of torching a mortgage. Burglarize bur'-gler-ize: What a crook sees with. Control... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

death row

On a given night, 2 death row inmates are scheduled to be electrocuted on old sparky. While one execution is in progress, the pastor administers to the other condemned man in his cell. "Don't worry my son", says the pastor, "as soon as the high voltage reaches your brain, it numbs all your senses,... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, November 7, 2016

question

Read this question, come up with an answer and then scroll down to the bottom for the result. This is not a trick question. It is as it reads. No one I know has got it right.. While at the funeral of her own mother, a woman met a man who she did not know. She thought he was 'amazing'. She believed... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, November 5, 2016

Comebacks to think and not say

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of sh*t. 2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce. 3. How about never? Is never good for you? 4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public. 5. I'm really easy to get along with once... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, November 4, 2016

What happens when it is scripted

These great questions and answers are from the days when ' Hollywood Squares' game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.. Q.. Paul, what is a good reason for pounding meat? A. Paul Lynde: Loneliness! (The audience... Sign in to see full entry.