Wednesday, April 16, 2014
#43
A new miracle doctor was in town. He could cure anything and anybody, and everyone was amazed. Everyone except for Mr. Smith, the town’s grouch So Mr. Smith went to this 'miracle doctor' to prove that he wasn't anybody special. So he goes and tells the doctor, "Hey, doc, I have lost my sense of...
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How did you get that?
Bill: Where did you get that gold watch Joe? Joe: I won it in a race. Bill: How many people participated in it? Joe: Three, a policeman, the owner of the watch, and me!!
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Tuesday, April 15, 2014
how did you get that?
The Old Man and the Sea A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns to tell their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks "So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?" The pirate replies "I was swept overboard...
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a man...
A man is incomplete until he is married… then he is finished.
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Monday, April 14, 2014
Christening
After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car, his father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home and I wanted to stay with you guys."
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Playtime
Two kids were deciding what game to play. One said, “Let’s play doctor.” “Good idea,” said the other. “You operate, and I’ll sue.”
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Saturday, April 12, 2014
groannnnnnnnn
One day while at her job as a bank loan officer, Patty Black, had a frog hop onto her desk and say, "I would like to apply for a lily-pad improvement loan." Patty looked incredulously at the frog and said, "I'm sorry, we don't loan money to frogs." To which the frog replied, "I have collateral," as...
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mental ward
Eight men have been at a mental hospital for a period of time and are being tested to find out how they are progressing in order for them to leave the institution. The doctor in charge takes them all into a room and with a ball pen draws a door on the wall and asks each one of the patients to try...
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Thursday, April 10, 2014
crazy jay
Jay went to a psychiatrist. “Doc, he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed I think there is somebody under it. I get under the bed; I think there’s somebody on top of it. Top, under, under top. I’m going crazy!” “Just put yourself in my hands for two years,” said the shrink. “Come to me...
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composition assignment
Teacher: Class, you have 30 minutes to write a composition on the subject of Baseball Jonah: Here’s my paper Teacher: Jonah, you spent only one minute writing your essay Lets hear what you wrote Jonah: Game called off on account of rain
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