Bra Pat's Urban Legends

By Setaki - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Everything Else

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

LIFT ETIQUETTE ( 2)

“Howdy Folks” said Crocodile Dundee as he boarded the plane. There was no response to his greeting as he was now in America and not the Australian outback where he came from. It was his first visit to the USA. Every time I enter a lift and I greet people and get no response I think of this scene... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, August 19, 2013

LIFT ETIQUETTE (1)

“You mean you had to walk, all the way up to the 10 th floor in the past?” Sarah asked her mother Mary who worked on said floor of the Majestic Building in the central business district. “Yes my child. We were not allowed to use the lifts, even the service lifts,’’ said Mary. They were in the... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, August 17, 2013

THE LAST COOKIE

The Right Reverend Thomas was due to visit the family of Petros to interview him as he had applied for a bursary from the Church to further his studies abroad. Little Johnny, his younger brother, was warned to stay out of sight, behave himself and not to swear in front of the Reverend. He promised... Sign in to see full entry.

REVENGE

“If this is the cream you can imagine what the scum is like.” One particular nasty lecturer during our first year at Medical School used to say. Admission criteria used to be stringent in those days- only students who had excelled in Mathematics and Physical Science in high school, ‘the cream of the... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

THE GOOD LIFE

A popular song of the sixties refers to one beer guzzling S’dudla-S’kaJosefa, a voluptous damsel, who would have made Rubens’ reclining nudes green with envy.She used to spend the day at a shebeen dancing and drinking with friends and Joseph her boyfriend and late at night would run home before her... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

JUSTINUS, MATOBOZA AND PEOPLE OF THE BUSH

He was nowhere to be found. It was five minutes before the Easter Saturday evening service and the newly ordained, first black Catholic Bishop of the province had not arrived yet. The Congregation was becoming restless. “It is people like him who give blacks a bad name.” Some congregants, who wanted... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, August 12, 2013

NIGHT SOIL

For two weeks she could not sleep. Every time she put her head on her pillow there would be the belching roar and clanging of gears of a tractor outside her house. By the time she looked out of the window she would see the rear light of a front-end loader disappearing into the night. In the morning... Sign in to see full entry.

"WHAT CAT IS AVERSE TO MILK ?"

“I am already late for my appointment, Cousy, please not today.” My cousin Boy-Boy pleads with me to spare him the lecture I always give him about overindulgence in alcohol and not looking for work though he is a qualified teacher by profession. We call each other ‘Cousy,’ short for ‘cousin’ “What... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, August 9, 2013

THE NOUVEAU RICHE

“Percy don’t be so cruel. Give the man something. He has not eaten for a long time. Look how his ribs are sticking out. Show some compassion” said Beauty to her husband when he refused to give ‘change’ to an elderly street beggar who had offered to look after their Mercedes Benz in the parking lot... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

GENDER WARS DOGGEREL

Bad is the Bitch That bites the feeding hand But badder is the Witch That sends your head rolling in the sand These are the words of Rapper Bored Crotch clutching crouching scumbag That Bobby so much adored And wished to emulate Now Bobby was a creature Amoeba more than man His brains were in his... Sign in to see full entry.

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