Wednesday, November 17, 2004
My husband and I made a decision.
We are going to rent our daughters an apartment and then work on getting GAU, and SSi, etc. For now, we just need to have them living away from us. I told my husband it was them or me. i would rather be homeless than live in my present situation. They will move out December 15. Until then, I will...
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Friday, November 12, 2004
Creating a Crisis
Our laws are such that it takes a crisis in order for someone to get what they need. So my plan is to create a crisis. We will rent an apartment for our daughters and they can live it in on their own. They will have to get to the doctor, take their medicine and get what they need on their own. If...
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Monday, November 8, 2004
What do you do when you don't know what to do?
Tonight I called the crisis line and then the police. They were polite, but legally there is nothing they can do. Kelly can ruin everything we have, but she doesn't have to be hospitalized unless she harms herself or others. She can drive us crazy, but she has to physically harm us before she can be...
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Saturday, November 6, 2004
Why I don't work.
I know that some women in my shoes would work. i don't. I don's see how i could work and deal with what happens with my daughters. Sometimes I wonder if I am capable of working. I have only worked for about six years in my whole life. I suffered from terrible anxiety when I was young which made...
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Friday, November 5, 2004
Another day in the psych ward
Living with an addict in active addiction is very hard. They lie to you, sometimes steal from you and their moods are totally unpredictable. If they take uppers, then they can stay awake for days and have tremendous energy. However they usually are not productive and their work quality is poor. I...
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Wednesday, November 3, 2004
I live in a mental institution
On the way home from a church service my daughters were commenting on the sermon. Then they started singing. Their comments were completely off the wall. Brenda thought that the speaker was talking about us. Kelly told us her new career plans. Even though I consider Brenda somewhat sane, she still...
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Monday, November 1, 2004
The stress will kill me.
No it won't. Friday was a bad day, Saturday was hard--but then I went to an NA dance and had a lot of fun. Sunday was better. Some of my stress is due to changing my medication which makes me more depressed and angry. This is not a good time to change medications. So I will just stop talking the new...
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Saturday, October 30, 2004
Why I can't deal with this anymore.
Yesterday I went to a meeting with my sponsee to help her work on her steps. My daughter called and said that her sister was cooking and making a big mess. So I went home and found that my daughter Kelly was indeed cookie and making a mess, but it wasn't a big problem. So Kim and I worked on her...
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Thursday, October 28, 2004
The Daily Cycle
Every evening, Brenda becomes morose and depressed. She thinks of all the bad things and thinks that something or someone can make her feel better. With sunset, comes the blues. I used to go through that daily depression also, even when I wasn't depressed. When I was depressed, the cyclical nature...
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Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Minimum Wage Jobs
Someone kindly suggested that my daughters get minimum wage jobs. The suggestion is genuine. Unfortunately in my experience the most stressful jobs are minimum wage jobs. Generally employers who pay the maximum either expect a lot for their money or they put a lot of pressure on their employees. In...
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