Mag's Bag

By MaggieMae - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Good Morning Jokes.......................

LIFE AFTER DEATH: "DO YOU BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH?" THE BOSS ASKED ONE OF HIS EMPLOYEES. "YES, OF COURSE SIR," THE NEW EMPLOYEE REPLIED. "WELL, THEN, THAT MAKES EVERYTHING JUST FINE," THE BOSS WENT ON. "AFTER YOU LEFT EARLY YESTERDAY TO GO TO YOUR GRANDMOTHER'S FUNERAL, SHE STOPPED IN TO SEE... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, April 27, 2007

Eat Desert First...........................

Here’s another neat story I received this week from a classmate of mine. It’s a lesson I could learn right now, if not for the fact that I’m diabetic. Shucks! One day I had a date for lunch with friends. Mae, a little old "blue hair" about 80 years old, came along with them---All in all, a pleasant... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

The Daffodil Principle............

Here's one that I acquired this past week that I, personally, enjoyed and hope you do too. The Daffodil Principle: Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over." I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, April 21, 2007

A Gift.............

I don't know who wrote this, but it says something for those of us who are at this stage of our lives, and for those of you who will one day be here. Enjoy! maggiemae A Gift The other day a young person asked me how I felt about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Do you know the answers???...............

1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit? Unique Up On It. 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit? Tame Way, Unique Up On It. 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest? They Take The Psycho Path 4. How Do You Get Holy Water? You Boil The Hell Out Of It. 5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

OK, were any of these hymns written for you?......................

Dentist's Hymn..............................Crown Him with Many Crowns Weatherman's Hymn.....................There Shall Be Showers of Blessings Contractor's Hymn........................The Church's One Foundation The Tailor's Hymn.........................Holy, Holy, Holy The Golfer's... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Here's Some Funnies............................

One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went golfing. ********************** A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, April 7, 2007

This Will Give You Chills..................

AFTER A FEW OF THE USUAL SUNDAY EVENING HYMNS, THE CHURCH'S PASTOR SLOWLY STOOD UP, WALKED OVER TO THE PULPIT AND, BEFORE HE GAVE HIS SERMON FOR THE EVENING, HE BRIEFLY INTRODUCED A GUEST MINISTER WHO WAS IN THE SERVICE THAT EVENING. IN THE INTRODUCTION, THE PASTOR TOLD THE CONGREGATION THAT THE... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

By All Means, Get Married.......................................

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David Bissonette When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, April 1, 2007

A Couple Of Jokes To Start Your Week.............................

A man went to a pet store to get a fish. As he was looking around the store, he noticed a strange, brightly colored fish. He asked the owner what the fish was called. That's a parrot fish," said the owner. "It sings like a bird." The man was incredulous. The owner sensed the man's hesitancy and told... Sign in to see full entry.

Headlines (What is this?)