Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Martha's Redneck Tips

I saw this one and just had to share it with you.... 1. Never take a beer to a job interview. 2. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. 3. It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church. 4. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. 5. Even if you're... Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Keys in the Car

How many of you have locked your keys in the car at one time or another? I have done on more than one occasion...This occasion was special...It was what they call a dee dee moment... I was on my way to a sorority reunion in Kansas City. I stopped in Springfield to pick up my date. Boy oh boy that... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

You are healed

An Irishman in a wheelchair rolls into a bar and asks the waitress for a cup of coffee. He then looks over at the bar and asks the waitress, "Is that Jesus?" The waitress says that it is, so the Irishman says, "Give him a cup of coffee... I'll pay." A few minutes later, an Englishman with a humped... Sign in to see full entry.

Duck Hunting

A guy was duck hunting in Alabama when the park ranger walks up, "Afternoon sir", the ranger says, "You got an Alabama duck hunting license"? "Yes I do", the redneck replies. The ranger picks up one of the ducks and sticks a finger up it's bum and takes a lick of his finger then says, "Sorry but... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Privates no more

Two boys from the mountains, Leroy and Jasper have been promoted from privates to sergeants. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Leroy says, "Hey Jasper, there's the NCO Club. Let's you and me stop in." "But we's privates," protests Jasper. "We's sergeants now, "says Leroy, pulling him... Sign in to see full entry.

Sometimes it's just better to leave well enough alone!

A guy was on trial for murder and if convicted, would get the electric chair. His brother found out that a red neck was on the jury and figured he would be the one to bribe. He told the red neck that he would be paid $10,000 if he could convince the rest of the jury to reduce the charge to... Sign in to see full entry.

Busted!

Young Boudreaux applied for an engineering job way, way up north in Shreveport. A local man applied for the same job and both applicants, having the same qualifications, were asked to take a test by the department manager. Upon completion of the test, both men missed only one question. The manager... Sign in to see full entry.

Friday, April 5, 2013

Back at you honey

A man escapes from a prison where he’s been locked up for 15 years He breaks into a house and inside, he finds a young couple in bed. He ties him to a chair. Wh ile tying the wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he’s in... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

lottery winner

A Redneck buys a ticket and wins the lottery. He goes to Austin to claim it and the man verifies his ticket number. The Redneck says, "I want my $20 million." The man replied, "No, sir. It doesn't work that way. We give you a million today and then you'll get the rest spread out for the next 19... Sign in to see full entry.

im cured!

A redneck father confronted his daughter one night. "I don't like that new boyfriend, he's rough and common and bloody stupid with it." "Oh no, Daddy," the daughter replied, "Fred's ever so clever, we've only been going out nine weeks and he's cured me of that illness I used to get once a month." Sign in to see full entry.