Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Friday, May 27, 2016

2 engineers

Two engineering students meet on campus one day. The first engineer calls out to the other, "Hey -- Nice bike! Where did you get it?" "Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young co-ed rides up on this bike. She jumps off, takes off all of her clothes, and... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, May 26, 2016

windows

Last year I replaced several windows in my house and they were the expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work has been completed for a whole year and I had yet to pay for them. Boy oh boy did we go 'round. Just because I'm... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, May 24, 2016

how do I?

(Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to his senator) The Honorable Tom Harkin 731 Hart Senate Office Building Phone (202) 224 3254 Washington DC, 20510 Dear Senator Harkin, As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, May 23, 2016

2007

Congress Votes to Outsource Presidency, Washington, DC (AP) Congress today announced that the office of President of the United States of America will be outsourced to India as of July 1, 2007. The move is being made in order to save the President's $500,000 yearly salary, and also a record $521... Sign in to see full entry.

Sunday, May 22, 2016

damn building

This is a true story and the account of the investigation makes it even better... The Dam Dear Mr. DeVries: It has come to the attention of the Department of Environmental Quality that there has been recent unauthorized activity on the above referenced parcel of property. You have been certified as... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, May 19, 2016

10 commandments

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery," and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...It creates a hostile work environment. Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, May 18, 2016

bush

George Bush meets with the Queen of England. He asks her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give me?" "Well," says the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people." Bush frowns. "But how do I know the people... Sign in to see full entry.

Tuesday, May 17, 2016

marksmanship

One of the best marksmen in the FBI was passing through a small town. Everywhere he saw evidences of the most amazing shooting. On trees, on walls, and on fences there were numerous bull's-eyes with the bullet hole in dead center. The FBI man asked one of the townsmen if he could meet the person... Sign in to see full entry.

Monday, May 16, 2016

irs

A man called to testify at the Internal Revenue Service (IRS), asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. "Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper," the accountant replied. Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. "Do not let them intimidate... Sign in to see full entry.

Saturday, May 14, 2016

service

I became confused when I heard the =word service"used with these agencies. Internal Revenue 'Service' U.S. Postal 'Service' Telephone 'Service' Cable TV 'Service' Civil 'Service' State, City, County & Public 'Service' Customer 'Service' This is not what I thought 'service' meant. But today, I... Sign in to see full entry.