Oh no you didn't!

By Annicita - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Friday, March 8, 2013

BRUNETTE Joke #2

The brunette had been married about a year One day the she came running up to her husband, jumping for joy He didn't know how to react So he started jumping up and down along with her "Why are we so happy?" he asked She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!" "Great" he said, "tell me... Sign in to see full entry.

BRUNETTE Joke

There was a competition to swim from Santa Monica to Catalina Doing only the breaststroke The only three women who entered the race were a Brunette A Redhead and a Blonde After approximately 14 hours, the Blonde staggered up on the shore She was declared the fastest breaststroker About 40 minutes... Sign in to see full entry.

REDHEAD Jokes

Here are a few one liners to get you started.... REDHEADS ARE FAMOUS FOR THEIR TEMPERS AND UNPREDICTABILITY...HOW FAMOUS? Redheads don't sleep...they wait. If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3? A redhead. When you open a can of whoop-ass, a redhead... Sign in to see full entry.

Thursday, March 7, 2013

Bragging Rights

A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large". Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of... Sign in to see full entry.

Desert Island

A passenger plane traveling to California is suddenly hit with a severe engine problem and plummets into the Pacific Ocean. The impact is such that the plane is ripped apart leaving only one man alive. After hours of swimming he spies an island and drags himself up onto the sandy shores. Though he... Sign in to see full entry.

Another Aussie Joke

Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for Six days. Eventually, Michael the Archangel found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired of God, "Where have you been?" God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, "Look Michael, look... Sign in to see full entry.

hearing aid

A man was telling his neighbor, "I just bought a new hearing aid. It cost me four thousand dollars, but it's state of the art. It's perfect." "Really," answered the neighbor. "What kind is it?" "Twelve thirty." Sign in to see full entry.

Investing

An artist asked the gallery owner if there had been any interest in his paintings on display at that time. "I have good news and bad news," the owner replied. "The good news is that a gentleman inquired about your work and wondered if it would appreciate in value after your death. When I told him it... Sign in to see full entry.

Waiting on the bus

Two old women were sitting on a bench waiting for their bus. The buses were running late, and a lot of time passed. Finally, one woman turned to the other and said, "You know, I've been sitting here so long, my butt fell asleep!'. The other woman turned to her and said "I know! I heard it snoring!" Sign in to see full entry.

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

retirement home

A man at a retirement home was walking around with his zipper down holding his penis. A young nurse says "Why are you doing that?" He replies, "It died today." "Oh that's terrible!", the nurse replied The next day the man has his penis hanging outside of his pants again. The same nurse says, "I... Sign in to see full entry.