The crazy lady strikes again for Thursday, August 12, 2004

In this post, Editormum mentions ten things she wished she would have done differently. One of those ten things really hit home with me. Specifically, Editormum mentions that she wishes she would have cared a little less what people thought of her. I could say the same thing about myself, as I'm sure many of you could. But for me, the issue is that I cared too much what certain people thought of me, and it hindered my ability to take outsiders into my confidence. To this day, I find myself... Sign in to see full entry.

My appointment with the crisis counselor went better than I could have hoped for. What helped was that I was finally honest with this guy. I told him basically the same things I'm writing here in this blog. I have to admit that it was the first time I'd been that honest with a therapist. No wonder my last one was complaining about how difficult I am to get to know. Sign in to see full entry.

RachelAnna brought up yet another issue which hit home with me. In this post, she talks about her encounter with a former boyfriend, who told her she had a certain power over men. Although I've never had a similar experience, I do know what it's like to have that kind of power. At one time, I felt as if I might have had it over my former boyfriend. Much of his free writing on his Geocities sites is written with me in mind; I can tell this because there are references to activities I once engaged... Sign in to see full entry.

Depression is painful. I ought to know. But I finally figured out one cause of the depression. As I said before, I have created pseudonyms on Yahoo, for the specific purpose of being secretive - because I can. Using one of these pseudonyms, I have been keeping track of my former boyfriend; I have even referred to this pseudonym as "my informant" in other blogs because I didn't want to admit that I was duplicitous enough to hide under such deep cover. What distressed me was finding out through... Sign in to see full entry.