Pondering
I sit in pondering I wonder: should I have been stronger?, pushed harder? would it have been better to surrender to your emotional Vesuvius? accept what is? Move away from the fires sooner? Often, I think that is it!: Once having unintentionally, exposed my insanity as the weakness it is, I should have surrendered completely to our feelings of shame; and so, turned and run into hiding from blame. Oh estaughforallah, estaforallah*, take this small self to an early grave the resurrected Self knows... Sign in to see full entry.