Go to I WRITE, THEREFORE I AM
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Quirky
Don't go....you are needed, and as you can see from the comments here, what you have experienced is not how the majority of Blogit members feel and respond to you. I get shunned by some because I write raunchy stuff; I've been assumed stupid by some my whole life for having an accent....and then because I am often silly and overly friendly...well, I could go on....and I'm not trying to be facetious. I know you have a lifetime of pain and I can't even begin to imagine it...but only ignorant people would think you have "tainted" blood because of your brother...and there are plenty of ignorant people in the world - no matter where you go, you might run into some of them. Also, please consider what Lensman said....there could be some of that at work here. Also, don't let other people determine anything that is important to you. Leave or stay based on what Blogit means to you and not what a few ignorant people do.
posted by
Krisles
on August 30, 2005 at 7:40 PM
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Quirky
I sent you an email before I read this. This is about as sick as one human being can be. I don't care what kind of hard feelings may between two people a comment such as this is beyond what any decent human being would do. I am so very, very sorry this happened.
For those who are being critical, you have never walked in Quirky's shoes and I can't imagine how painful this is, but I know there are certain family "secrets" that if they were thrown in my face would be more than I would wish to put up with. This is the type of thing that effects someone for the rest of their lives and I am personally disgusted that anyone felt the need to go THAT low.
posted by
Bel_
on August 30, 2005 at 6:55 PM
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Quirky,
I am disappointed.I thought you had more salt than to even think of pulling out a blog because of what somebody said.We all have our skeletons in the cupboard,and you are no different.You might even be better off than many of us because it was your brother that was the offender, not you! None of this is your fault,and you know it ,so stop punishing yourself!:)
posted by
Meringue
on August 30, 2005 at 6:46 PM
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Quirky,
You have some gumption on you, because were the positions reversed, I don't know if I'd 'tell'. As you know, we tend to be judgemental, no matter how openminded we think we are - it's just that we have different prejudices. Personally, I don't give a rat's behind that your brother did what he did. I understand that his actions caused a lot of pain and I know that it wasn't your fault. Murder and the capacity to commit it cannot and doesn't 'rub off' in my mind.
posted by
word.smith
on August 30, 2005 at 6:36 PM
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Well, I bet people think the same thing
about me, but I don't care. I could never kill someone for fun, but logically, society does kill people and justifies it in various ways. The death penalty it a good example of acceptable killing, soldiers kill people, police officers kill people, professional boxers kill people. People can say it's necessary killing or sport, or whatever, but it happens none the less. Anyway, I'm sorry. Take care
posted by
Flumpystalls3000
on August 30, 2005 at 3:48 PM
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I think everyone goes through times when we hope to be accepted and
understood only to find out how cruel and unkind people can be. It happens everywhere and none of us, no matter how thick the skin, are immune to it.
posted by
Ariala
on August 30, 2005 at 2:21 PM
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Quirky, please don't go...
Your brother and what he did undoubtedly shaped you to a certain extent, but as far as I can tell it made you more not less sensitive to others and you have always been respected by most here for your courage in sharing those tragic events. There are always a few idiots and assholes in the woodpile...I really believe that they are an insignificant minority and just seen to be multitudes because of their volume and negativity...screw 'em and keep being you...peace...
posted by
jimmy68
on August 30, 2005 at 2:17 PM
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Quirky...the reader can feel your strong emotions in this piece...
This is one of my favorite posts of yours. It's raw. It's real. And it is well-done. I always try to look at the Big picture, too. Don't ever feel as such. Do not try and carry the world on your shoulders. I hope no one deliberately hurt you here on Blogit land....I am ultra-sensitive as you can see by yesterday's post. I want everyone to love me. Sheesh....That won't happen. Stand tall, Quirky.
posted by
MedusaNextDoor
on August 30, 2005 at 1:07 PM
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quirky--
Your cyber friend sounds like the kind of person who walks up to someone in a wheelchair at the store, and asks in a loud voice, "What happened to you?" A kinder, gentler Blogit. Now there's a dream worth recounting. Hemlocker
posted by
Hemlocker
on August 30, 2005 at 1:00 PM
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The next time you withdraw money from a bank or write a check, remember that friendship is like a bank account. You can't draw on it over and over without making some deposits.
Today is a wonderful day to make a deposit in one of your "Friendship Accounts". Who's will it be? When will you make it? What will you deposit?
I am touching base with a friend whose friendship account could use a deposit of love and care. Don’t go away, there are many out here that DO care!
posted by
Jillians.New-Beginning
on August 30, 2005 at 12:23 PM
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Judgement
I am very surprised at the fact that you are feeling hurt about being judged.
You comment on 'writers being able to share their opinions without their work getting ridiculed - you thought that a virtual world would be more understanding.
You seem to me to be a face of your faceless enemies. I see you have judged fellow bloggers and chosen to catergorise them. Did they wish to be put forward for nominantion. Was it a pleasure or a pain to be for them to be on the final list.
My comment comes with the greatest respect, I'm expressing an opinion but would welcome any feedback.
posted by
Cherry_bel
on August 30, 2005 at 12:22 PM
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Please don't leave! While I know it's hard to soar with the eagles when you seem to be surrounded with turkeys...it's more like you are really surrounded by eagles with the occasional turkey showing up & creating chaos. Look at all the other's comments. Most of us enjoy your writings & want you to stay. So what if there's the occasional "odd" comment? You are important. You matter. Please stay.
ravencat18
posted by
ravencat18
on August 30, 2005 at 11:46 AM
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quirky-girl
no, no don't pull the plug. people like you and me, with our history and "odd" experiences, have to maek our own fit, just squeeze in however we can adn make ourselves at home as much as we can. put yoru feet up and relax....someone understands, at least the sense of not belonging. i think we begin to belong when we allow ourselves to, when we start to let go of the long held belief that we never will...maybe? what do you think?
posted by
MysticGmekeepr
on August 30, 2005 at 10:32 AM
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Quirks: my view on whether you should leave - absolutely no way. And yours is a genuine feeling for wanting to leave, not a scam. For all the right reasons you're questioning your time here. Be assured of this: I do not want you to leave. I am a pipe dreamer. The pipe dreamers are all around you. We want you here and we will support you.
posted by
_dave_says_ack_
on August 30, 2005 at 8:17 AM
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Quirkyalone
This place always has it's up and downs....always happens when you have old people leaving and new people joining everyday...but it makes life interesting...
posted by
MiaElla
on August 30, 2005 at 7:54 AM
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Quirky
Geez, First Mate, we're both in the water. I say let's swim for that island off to the left. It looks like it has coconut trees and some wildlife. Hell, we could always swim back to the island of Blog if we want to.
posted by
Pooch116
on August 30, 2005 at 7:43 AM
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Believe in yourself and keep your head high, You are one and he is another, You may both have been born of the same blood but the difference is in you, your choices and your desires. You must make the choices that are right for YOU. Judgement day will come and we will all be judged but, it is not of others to judge upon you.
Be the creator of your own life, not a victim of it.
posted by
Jillians.New-Beginning
on August 30, 2005 at 6:19 AM
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Quirky,
I agree with what others have said here. You are not your brother. Yes, siblings have some traits in common. I don't think this is one of them. I enjoy your writing and would hate to see you go. Don't let the opinions of some dictate what you do. Those that judge you for who YOU are, not for whom you were related to, are the ones to look to for guidance. I have no idea who your brother is/was. Don't care. I just enjoy reading you. Hang tough!
posted by
NCwriter
on August 30, 2005 at 6:18 AM
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Quirky
of course you may not believe this, but I am 99.5% sure you would never see "the look" on my face. The only reason I am not positive is because I only know you via your "blogit persona" which could be faked. Heck even if you just play the odds how many brother/sister homicidal maniac pairs have there ever been?!
Sorry people are so stupid. But they are.
posted by
FactorFiction
on August 30, 2005 at 6:17 AM
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As a mother I know that children can have the same parents and can be brought up in the same way, but turn out totally different. My three boys might look the same, but they are all so different in personality. You are you and your brother was a different person all together. Don't forget that.
posted by
Ca88andra
on August 30, 2005 at 2:04 AM
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Now, Quirky, don't be talking like that. I haven't been here long, but I have a great affection for you. Yes, your brother's illness makes you a curiosity in a lot of people's eyes. And yes, what your brother is will always be in the back of many people's minds. But the smart ones of the bunch should realize that you are two different people. Siblings in many families turn out radically different from each other, and there is no reason for anyone to believe that just because your brother is one way, that you are the same. I didn't know about your brother before now, and I don't see you any differently than I had, except in a softer, more illuminating, light. Please don't go.
posted by
SilverMoon7
on August 30, 2005 at 1:19 AM
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Quirky!!
That had to have been uttered by one full of ignorance; you can't let their weakness crush your lovely, lovely strength of character. I know you are a sensitive soul underneath and such stupidity hurts, but please remember the majority here love your goodness and kind heart.
And would be devastated if you left! Please, please don't!!
posted by
Katray2
on August 29, 2005 at 11:10 PM
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Hmm...
Maybe it's just me, but I've never even contemplated the fact that you could be "homicidal" because it just doesn't fit. I am a lot of things that my brother is not, good and bad, and vice versa. Murdering doesn't typically run in families, although I can imagine the stigma that it would carry.
I feel for you, because it's as if you are caught in a trap that your brother set so long ago..
posted by
RachelAnna
on August 29, 2005 at 10:05 PM
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Quirk
I wonder if it's possible that you almost expect people to think these things about you and so you're assuming that they are when they're not really. For example, it's never entered my head for a second to think that you may be a chip off the block, so to speak. I've worked in the justice system for 25 years and I've seen the real ones come and go and their families show up in court with them. The character and backgrounds of the family members always seem to be perfectly normal. There just happens to be this black sheep in their midst. But I hear you. It can't be easy to be in your position. Just thought I'd let you know how it looks from where I am, anyway.
posted by
Lensman
on August 29, 2005 at 6:57 PM
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Quirkyalone..
Dear Quirky.. Please don't feel so stepped upon! It is your sensitivity at work.. People who judge you by anothers actions are way out of line. Everyone has a 'Black Sheep' in their family and some don't even know it.Pull up your bootstraps and climb your way out of this s____ .. Hold your head high and know that there are many people who respect you for who you are!!
posted by
BrightIrish
on August 29, 2005 at 6:40 PM
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Quirks... always keep in mind that people are stupid. It helps...
Seriously, you can't pick your family, nor can you control what they do or have done. But remember, even the most intelligent people can still be known to put their foot in their mouth. Don't let a few turkeys get you down. You know better, and that's really all that matters.
posted by
-blackcat
on August 29, 2005 at 6:36 PM
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Please don't leave
I wuv ewe! No leaving!
posted by
Jemmie211
on August 29, 2005 at 6:05 PM
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I care, but I'm pretty darn sure you're not.
Course I COULD be wrong, but I don't think so. It worries me that you feel as if you can feel hatred through cyber links....People write hateful things for the same reasons you feel the safety to reveal what you've shown. It’s a "safe" outlet to spew their frustrations. Shrug off the crap and embrace the well wishers. And most of all keep writing!
posted by
MissMary
on August 29, 2005 at 5:27 PM
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Unfortunately people will be more open to some truths than others. Personally I don't define you by that event. I look at the big picture and see there are things I like and others well less so but I leave them aside. I posted something about these kinds of thoughts a little while ago
I think the virtul world is less understanding because people look at words which can appear baldly on the page. You should take into account too, as I said in my post the other day that we have something of a "sick building" syndrome going on here right now and it does have an impact
posted by
Azur
on August 29, 2005 at 5:25 PM
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Quirky,
If ever we should get together, the only look you are going to see on my face is the one of joy to finally meet you and my eyes will say nothing more than "Let's go "PARTY". 
Shadow
posted by
Keshet
on August 29, 2005 at 5:23 PM
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