Funeral Fun

By archiew - About Me - E-mail this page - Add to My Favorites - Add to Blog List - See other blogs in Humor

Saturday, April 24, 2004

Funeral De-processing

As technology and medicine improve, we could lay out a funeral home factory style, with a conveyor belt to transport the corpse theough what might be called a de-manufacturing or de-processing process. Along the conveyor belt would be technicians from various skill areas within the medical field,... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:33 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, April 20, 2004

An ecological idea for burials

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posted by archiew at 8:09 AM | add or view comments (3) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, April 17, 2004

Pre-Death Memorial Services . . .

Why not enjoy your funeral along with all your friends and relatives? If you feel you are near death, say, within a year or so, your doctor should advise you on this, then, by all means, plan and execute (oops!) your funeral services. When you actually die, then they can take the body without... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:20 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, April 10, 2004

What If . . . .

On Easter Sunday, that God would choose someone, perhaps one person from each continent, and to raise that one person from the dead, someone who had died the previous Friday, perhpas. What a way to celebrate Easter, eh? Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 5:30 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Wednesday, April 7, 2004

Raising Money for the Widow or Widower

Funerals are emotionally and financially stressful. Here is an idea to make death a little less financially stressful: Have some entertainment, volunteer entertainment. It doesn't have to be professional, although that would be nice, but it has to be good. Sell tickets at the door for mourners to... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:43 AM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Tuesday, April 6, 2004

Another fun idea for a funeral

Especially for you car lovers. Wouldn't it be neat to have a hearse of the same year as you were born? A person born in 150 would, for instance, have his body transported in a 1950 Cadillac. For more authenticity, and to honor the dead, guests could dress in period clothing for the deceased's birth... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 3:02 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Saturday, April 3, 2004

Using Stand-Up Comics for the funeral:

Funerals are too grim; there is too much sadness there to be sending someone off to a "better place." Why not have local stand-ups, even friends and family members, give a 3 to 5 minute comedy routine showing the fun and foibles of the deceased, or even play on the different relationships,... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 1:39 PM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Combine the service with the weird . . . .

Why not invite a cadre of psychics, sensitives and seance-givers to a funeral, just in case the deceased might have some words for friends and family. Heck, with those skills available, the deceased might even want to give his own eulogy! Were I able to speak to the dead, I'd make myself available... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 6:33 AM | add or view comments (4) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

Sunday, March 28, 2004

Mortuary Technician Home-Study Course . . .

There is an actual home-study Mortuary Technician course you can get on the internet for $495 complete. Yes, you can spend less than $500 and become a mortuary technician. Now, the site also sells books pertaining to the subject matter, but those are not required for the successful completion of the... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 8:03 PM | add or view comments (0) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

A Theatric Funeral Festival

Wouldn't it be great to be able to hire actors of different ages to portray key events in the deceased's life, from early childhood to the time of death? Sort, five to ten minute, skits could cover any significant or entertaining or explanatory events in teh deceased's life. These moments would be... Sign in to see full entry.

posted by archiew at 8:53 AM | add or view comments (2) | leave calling card | link to this | view only this entry

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Next time you are at a funeral, llisten tothe comments around you.

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