Jeff's Jots

Do they still make typewriters? Sign in to see full entry.

Our license plates here in Merryland go letter-number-number number-letter-letter. They used to go letter-letter-letter number-number-number. The purpose of this change of course was to make the license plate more difficult to memorize Sign in to see full entry.

The front page headline of the Washington Post today was about Redskins coach Jim Zorn being fired. THE FRONT PAGE HEADLINE!!! Not the front page of the sports section. THE FRONT PAGE HEADLINE. We've got two wars and a recession going on and the Washington Post thinks the most important story in the... Sign in to see full entry.

My friend G eats healthy food and has high blood pressure and high chloresterol. I eat junk food and my blood pressure and chlesterol are perfect. If you just looked at the two of us you would think pizza and cheeseburgers were healthy while broccoli and salads were junk food. Sign in to see full entry.

I've always believed that there are no bad people, just bad behavior. Hate the sin and love the sinner and all that jazz. Then I realized that that would mean that Saddam Huissan is just as good a person as Mother Teresa. Hmmm. May have to rethink that one Sign in to see full entry.

My New Year's resolutions are to gain weight and take up smoking. Since I never keep my resolutions I figure those are good one's to make Sign in to see full entry.

A married man has a romantic candlelight dinner with another woman. Another married man has a one night stand with a stranger. Which is worse? Sign in to see full entry.

Americans are fat. There's an obesity epidemic. So they say. I think the problem is that we just don't know how to lose weight. If only someone--a doctor or nutritionist would write a book about how to lose weight. Maybe that would help. Maybe it wouldn't even take a whole book. Maybe just a... Sign in to see full entry.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe--Jackie Mason Tiger Woods' self-inflicted troubles brought that quote to mind--and got me to thinking. I think Mr Mason was exaggerating just a bit but still there is a whole lot of adultery going on. Why? People's hormones... Sign in to see full entry.

I walked into the men's room, made my way to the urinal, unzipped and... Nothing. I didn't have to go. I had just gone at home a few minutes earlier. Sign in to see full entry.